It was time to take a break from the wonders and queues of Disney and deal with the pressing matter of getting on some of these fancy new coasters that had caused the push for this trip in the first place.
Day 4 – Busch Gardens Tampa
There’s quite the introduction when walking from the car park to the entrance. Hello freshly painted Montu, you’re looking rather yellow.
The actual entrance to the park must have been rather forgettable because my very next picture is this.
They’re clearly making statements about how this day is going to go.
Being at the very front of the park it was the obvious move to quash any anxiety over new ride breakdowns and get straight on this thing.
A man was animatedly shouting into his phone at his family who sounded like they weren’t yet in the park. “We’re in the front of the park, near the… the big Khwazi… the big I-Ron Khwazi. On the tables? God damn! What are you doing out there?! Get inside the park!” I’m so glad I caught this piece of dialogue because it forever redefined the character of this coaster. God damn I-Ron Khwazi!
And it’s fully justified, because #1 Iron Gwazi is an absolute beast. I was worried when it slowed to a crawl at the crest of the lift as I’m not one for caution on a ride, I like to be flung over the top of these things in a relentless manner. The disappointments of Shambhala are not what you want in your head to begin proceedings.
Once again it’s fully justified, because it’s an absolute beast. That drop still manages to have all the makings of one of the best in the business, though equally importantly the subsequent pull out into the next element is uncharacteristically intense for one of these. I don’t recall ever seeing stars on an RMC before and if you’re not feeling too fresh I can see it easily approaching grey-out status. But fear not, unlike some rides, they don’t dwell on that sensation for long.
I’d have struggled to describe to you how the rest of the ride plays out on only single figure laps and luckily enough we were able to get significantly more than that over the course of the trip and here’s how it goes down. Ish.
Wild, wonky airtime from the first, whatever it is, while you’re still trying to regain focus and composure from that pull out. Hurtling at speed through head choppers and up into that death roll thing. This is exactly the kind of inversion that deserved invention – good name, does cool stuff. It’s like their downwards barrel roll drops but with that extra surprise of rotating more than 360°, an out of control feeling I can only think is most similar to the 540° twist on B&M flyers. You think you’re done, and you’re not, it hits you hard, in this case with some wicked laterals on the exit.
Wild, wonky airtime from the third, whatever it is, while you’re still trying to regain focus and composure from that inversion.
This. The most effective sideways airtime hill I’ve ever encountered. Keeps you pinned for way longer than it has any right too and comes with a great near miss under the lift. A lot of these are just visual spectacles, this one delivers hard.
It enters more familiar territory at this point with some solid pops in different directions before hitting that signature stall just a little too fast to appreciate it fully. Others do this particular moment better.
The final sequence though, as violent as they come, particularly when seated towards the front of the train. RMC sure know how to end things on a bang and these 4 powerful bursts of ejector separated by banked turns don’t look like they should work at all. They really do.
So, as mentioned, it’s hard to catch your breath on this ride and process any of what is going on, which is a true strength of the layout. On my initial laps this contributed towards the ride feeling far too short, but as I grew more familiar with it, I learned to love it even more for the relentless machine that it was. Duration is the only real downside I can come up with at this point, and it’s barely even a downside because anything more might have spoiled the pacing. Perhaps it would have benefitted from one of those funky little pre-lift sections, though it does it’s best to try and remove you just the once, even before the chain begins.
Contrary to what we may have thought at the time, there is other stuff to do here.
From the worst to the best with #2 Air Grover.
These definitely don’t do it for me any more, blame China. It was cool to at least see that signature splash down of #3 SheiKra in person.
It’s hard to imagine a universe in which #4 Tigris is better than Helix, though I have seen that proclaimed. Beyond my usual lack of enthusiasm for the abomination that is the comfort collar, I don’t remember these trains being so obnoxiously hard to get into, it’s like an assault course. Nope, these don’t do it for me either.
Rather watch real tigers.
My standout memory of the Congo River Rapids is getting sunburnt on the final lift hill, some sort of capacity nightmare was going on even though it was a walk on.
I never expected to love a legend like #5 Kumba, but these things haven’t aged well. I sat there appreciating the engineering, but never really enjoying it. That quirky twist and dive into the tunnel was unexpected at least.
Disappointed. Falcon’s Fury has all the makings of a terror machine and is of course legitimately scary, but there’s no physical pay off to dropping on your face, it simply doesn’t do to you what drop towers do best.
Scorpion was broken somehow. What would Anton say?
Which meant that #6 Sand Serpent, a name I thought I’d made up, was vile. Second longest queue of the day for a lazily profiled mouse.
Still not sure what this is.
I wanted #7 Cheetah Hunt to be a bit of an undercat and was rooting for it to entertain me better than is generally proclaimed.
It did and it didn’t. I don’t so much mind the meandering and the stretched out elements, the weird straights that serve to get you a different piece of landscape rather than to enhance the ride. I did mind the restraints, and the falling into them in that dumb slow inversion that just feels completely out of place. Without it, it would have been a solid sit down with multi-launch goodness as there’s two decent airtime moments in the exit of the crow’s nest(?) and the surprisingly profiled return hill after the final launch. I also enjoyed the little slalom between the rocks, good lats there.
Rather watch real cheetahs.
#8 Cobra’s Curse was impressively themed in the queue, I liked the anger in the little preshow. While the big snake himself looks great, I never actually managed to catch what he was saying to us at the top of the elevator lift and do feel that would only have added to the experience. As a ride it’s an interesting take on the spinner and not what I anticipated, controlling you both forwards and backwards for different sections before having a light sequence of chaos. S’alright.
It’s a little bit scary to think about but I don’t believe these do it for me any more either. Whilst I can say #9 Montu was one of the better inverts out there, even with some real ferocity in certain places like that final corkscrew, they’re just so… formulaic and that really stands out when it’s in such close proximity to a ride that breaks all the rules.
Rather watch crocodiles. Wait, no, that’s an alligator.
And so, with the lap of the park complete, it was time to close out the evening with as many goes as possible on the lineup wrecker.
I’ve thought of one other downside in that it’s too difficult get photos of. A spectator coaster this is not, it’s stuck in a weird no-man’s land between service roads and sheds, while somehow being in the centre of the plot. It is glorious at night of course.
A cheeky bonus occurred in that #10 Scorpion re-opened halfway through the night. We took the opportunity for a quick sprint and, with relief, finally declared the park ‘complete’.
As the night drew on, the operations steadily ground to a halt and then God damn Iron Gwazi managed to break down. This kept us in the park nearly an hour longer than expected and it was already getting pretty late. Not good for my already aching bones but obviously worth it.
That’s Busch for now, though we’d be back later in the week for some proper reflection.
Next up on the agenda were the ‘credless’ Disney parks. With the desire to park hop and with Animal Kingdom being a particularly early opener, we decided to forego the lazy shuttle bus on this occasion in an attempt to justify having the hire car again. The one benefit to the parking tickets with their rather hefty price tags is that you are free to use it at any of the establishments within a given day.
Day 3 – Animal Kingdom
And here it is.
Once again the day began with a 3D cinema, It’s Tough to be a Bug!, because it’s likely the first thing you stumble across. Some of the effects were pretty scary in this one, to the point of making several children cry and their families leaving early. Dropping massive spiders from the ceiling will admittedly cause that, but I admire what they were going for. For me the biggest scare was at the very end when the insects leave the theatre before the guests, in a rather violating fashion.
The imaginatively named Dinosaur was a lot of fun, I find you can’t really go wrong with the ride system that Indiana Jones made famous. It has more back story, in that we’re time travellers trying to save an Iguanadon, along with a more claustrophobic feel to the layout. Associating the attraction with that film I had forgotten existed makes no impact on the proceedings, beyond this statue, which is probably a good thing.
It was rather upsetting to walk past Ex-spite-ition Everest while it undergoes the first proper maintenance in 16 years. How I long to ride that coaster. Hopefully it will be restored to it’s former glory when that time comes at least.
Instead we had to settle for views from the Kali River Rapids. Not the most impressive of these rides that Disney has put out, but solid fun with a light soaking. Having free-to-use ‘get other guests wet’ buttons is also a plus.
Time to enter Avatar land. This was the total opposite to Star Wars for me, I knew nothing about the franchise, hadn’t seen the film and was completely uninvested in what was going on. Would it win me over in a casual encounter?
To start, it was another of those epic moments of laying eyes on the scenery for the first time, there are few parks in the world that can make that type of impact. As we slowly wound our way up the multiple hour queue for Flight of Passage it maintained a steady impression of ‘this could be good’. The indoor parts got a bit rocky and plain, though there were also rooms full of stuff to look at, like one of those blue blokes in a jar.
The preshow felt a bit condescending to be honest. It’s like they anticipated me coming in with no prior knowledge and they try to cram a lot of terms into the dialogue that didn’t really need to be there like fictional language lessons. What makes this worse is that after a lot of faff, you move into another room for some safety instructions and a different scientist character starts covering some of the same ground again. We’re blue, we’re flying on creatures, that’s all I need to know.
Eventually we entered our ride area and strapped in to the motocoaster style seats, complete with that brutal anticipation of a restraint punching you squarely in the lower back. The system kicks into life and off you go, moto-flying theatre.
Credit where it’s due, this is by far my favourite flying theatre experience on record. It had subtle details that added some flair, such as the seat moving between your legs to simulate the breathing of the creature and some pretty killer scent and mist packages.
Most importantly for me though, the film managed to create that sense of wonder that I believe all of these types of attractions are, or should be, ultimately going for. Usually it’s flying around the world in some pretentious manner, or occasionally you get something in adventure mode instead and it’s a bit of a laugh. But this. This is all focused on actually living and feeling those moments you’re being presented with, being the Avatar and not just a tourist. They present it as a ritual, an experience of great significance, a flight of passage. I can’t really describe how, but it works. For me at least.
So does this.
The other ride in the area is the Na’vi River Journey, which was alright at best. I proclaimed as we boarded, after another rather extortionate wait, that all I wanted was a sit down and some blue. We got just that. There’s some visual effects in there that I can appreciate, but not all of it feels up to par. It’s another rehash of ‘breathe in your surroundings’ but far less impactful as you slowly sail past trees and wolves. The highlight is probably the big animatronic shaman character who sings various soothing syllables. “Na’vi waaa… wakalaaa… taka wakaaaa…”
This endured as a staple of the trip, whenever we got tired and needed to spout some nonsense, so at least the attraction made a lasting impression.
With that, Animal Kingdom was done as far as I was concerned. Time to hop in a car and grab a sandwich.
One thing about the Florida resort that didn’t gel with me was the lack of convenience exterior to the parks. We’ve already established they’re faffy to get between, but with that there’s also no Disney Village or City Walk experience to give that easy escape from a theme park for a quick bite to eat.
They do have Disney Springs, but it’s not designed for that. It’s entirely self-contained and is a bit of a mission to include in any Disney experience rather than just being a casual day out and shopping trip. We drove for a good while and ‘popped in’ to the free multi-storey car park in order to get reacquainted with the Earl of Sandwich, a Paris favourite. As a detour it was in excess of an hour and based on public transport on other days it could easily be two. Worth it? Yes.
Epcot
And here it is.
This was another wide-eyed novice experience for me, it’s nice to go to some of the most famous parks ever and not really have a clue what’s going on. First up was Spaceship Earth, located within the iconic building itself.
Rather than my expectations of it being about space, I instead found a slow and steep omnimover narrated by Judi Dench that concisely describes the history of humanity and the development of communication. Upon reaching the summit, the story ends, the cars turn backwards and you begin to descend. Now the story is about you. Built in touch screens allow you to answer a number of questions about your hopes for the future and then, by means of an on-ride photo and some cartoons, these dreams are realised. Funnily enough, my photo didn’t work, which only added to the comedy that ensued amongst us (and my personal relief).
Never mind that though, Mission: SPACE, specifically the Mars mission, kicked ass. It’s quite an intimidating build up, what with the number of times they tell you you’re on the ‘intense’ version as you go through the various videos of what it takes to be an astronaut. It’s only Disney.
The safety instructions get rather more worryingly specific when they tell you to face forward and breathe normally and try not to pass out. Like when Derren Brown tells you to calm down, only this actually means something. Then you board the extremely cramped little 4-person simulator pod, lower the over the shoulder restraints, see the complementary sick bags poking out at you and suddenly the realisation hits. This ain’t Disney.
Similar to Smuggler’s Run, we’d each been given a role that involved pushing buttons at certain points and whether or not they did anything remained dubious. They are a bit of a welcome distraction from the ride cycle which is, well, I loved it.
It’s so genius, what you see with your eyes not matching up with what’s actually happening to your body. Yet it’s believable, and a little bit terrifying. The sequence goes on through the various motions and I found it quite the physical endurance, but in a way I could appreciate for how unique and inventive the experience is. Better than Lech.
Journey into Imagination was more how I imagined Epcot to be. Dark rides about stuff I don’t really care about. It was filled with cool effects at least, the cage and a mirror and one of those lightning fast backdrop changes. Figment though, I didn’t get on with him at all. I hear they butchered the original ride for this, then brought him back in to try and save it. It’s gone.
Living with the Land was above and beyond how I imagined Epcot to be. Dark rides about growing plants. It was fine, I guess.
The Seas with Nemo & Friends wasn’t the first time that forcing Nemo onto a ride with fish as an afterthought has left it feeling flat. It was fine, I guess Never mind that though, dog on a dark ride!
Ugh, Coco. He’s even managed to take over the inside of this building, with all the shops and restaurants latching onto his theme. Thankfully he isn’t on the El Rio del Tiempo boat ride, though it does involve Donald Duck trying to be a Mariachi, which is grating enough in of itself.
We were just about ready to clean up, when Frozen Ever After broke down on us and had been evacuated. It had been holding the second biggest queue on park all day, so the dilemma was whether to camp it out in the hopes of a swift return and a guaranteed walk-on ride, or go and queue an hour for the one other thing we wanted, possibly then spiting us the evening show. The staff seemed reasonably optimistic and so we opted for the former. Sure enough, a reasonable amount of time later we were amongst one of the first boats to depart, the moment it was fixed.
You can tell this one is clearly shoehorned too, though it probably managed to satisfy any of the millions of guests that came here just to hear a bit of Let It Go in it’s prime. The story doesn’t make sense, it’s just a highlight reel of songs in poor chronological order, with some slightly off-looking face projections. The Marshmallow bit was solid though, with a decent enough drop. Glad we didn’t queue.
Last but not least was Test Track and we were in two minds as to whether to test it out, as it clearly can’t be better than Radiator Springs. I’d call it a winner, in the right company, though, once the nasty corporate sponsor queue was out of the way – it started to feel a bit like Ferrari Land for a minute.
The biggest surprise was entering this room in which you get to customise a car, one that seemingly comes out rather ridiculous looking no matter what you do to it. The initial intention was to recreate Homer’s bubble car, though it soon became clear that that sadly wasn’t possible. Deploy the cow catcher. This final product gets downloaded to your ticket which you then scan again upon boarding the ride.
The indoor section of the ride contained far more than I anticipated, with the various road tests being performed on your crude uploaded car, including some good acceleration and fun swerving going on, alongside the added jeopardy of regular scoreboards showing how you stack up against the other group sharing your ride vehicle.
Finally you head outside for the speed test and though it feels a bit of a non-event, topping 60Mph on a dark ride is rather impressive when you pause to think about it. As for the scores, we started out so well but lost 3 out of the 4 tests by the end. Needed more cup holders.
Time had run on a little and we just caught the lake show after the initial moments, from afar. It wasn’t anywhere as impressive as Magic Kingdom, with the water projection being the main focal point and yet far less clear than the two accompanying screens of visual filler. It did at least spend more time on each song, of which the selection felt pretty poor. Also Coco again. Bah.
That’s it then. Disney World complete in 3 days, bar one ride. What else have they got around here?
This was by far our most anticipated of the Disney days and the only one we’d made any kind of arrangements to return to later in the trip if needed. And oh, how it needed it.
And here it is.
Shows how little I knew of this place in that the Chinese theatre being the centrepiece was a complete surprise to me.
Things started off casual with some Muppet-Vision 3D. The preshow room was a bit of a drag, but I loved what they did with the theatre, having animatronic Statler and Waldorf up in the stage left balcony. Film itself was hit and miss with the comedy and I think the finale fell a bit flat. This isn’t why we’ve come.
For me, it was this. Star Wars land, and what a true visual stunner it is. I’ve missed those jaw-dropper moments from Disney as of late and this one takes the cake. I don’t think I’ve ever cared more about a theme park IP than I have for this franchise, it’s one I’ve always been really invested in, for better or worse, and the fact that something of this magnitude came to a place of this calibre at such a late point in it’s history just had me hyped up like little else before it in the theme park world. This was my Florida moment.
Anyway, The queue for Smugglers Run was stretching around the Falcon as we hopped on the end for a long wait.
Eventually it heads inside where there’s plenty of detail to keep guests distracted. The amount of effort for a simulator feels insane.
Then you get into the preshow and there’s a ridiculous animatronic.
Then you get batched and you’re actually on the ship, floor panels and everything. It’s such a heart in mouth moment if this means anything to anyone because the time spent amongst the most incredible parts of the theming are so fleeting and ultimately such a tease.
I’m not sure the ride itself quite delivers after all the build up. For all the intricacies throughout what you’ve just witnessed, it doesn’t feel much like you’re sitting in the Falcon at the end of it. The simulator sequence itself is ok at best, they try and throw in a little interactivity by assigning different roles and making you press a button at certain points but it doesn’t do a whole lot with it. The story is kinda there, if a bit woolly and I don’t really know what to think at the end of the day. At least it’s only the low tier attraction of the area.
It’s got nothing on the headline act, with a waiting time posted at 160mins. Well, here comes the longest queue of my career. Bad luck, Taron.
In stark contrast, the indoor queueline sections for Rise of the Resistance are rather repetitive and underwhelming. Rocks, cages, a lone screen like the people watch the Hoth attack from. Two hours with the question of ‘why are we here?’ rattling around the head.
Suddenly things get a little intense for the first preshow, all the familiar faces start appearing along with ludicrous animatronic BB-8. Oh, and actual Star Wars holograms are a real life thing now?
Then you see daylight for the first time in forever and this happens. Before you get a chance to think, you’re boarding the Derren Brown’s stand-up spaceship simulator flown by astounding animatronic squid head. Turns out it’s a trap, people die and you’re tractor beamed onto a Star Destroyer.
Suddenly daylight becomes this, and I love it even more. The bad guy staff batch you into various prison cells for an interrogation with Bill Weasley and big Kylo himself comes to force all the light out of the room and make it shake.
They make their excuses and a droid cuts you out through the wall of the cell and into your actual ride vehicles, a double team of 8-seater trackless beasts all driven by their own little evil-turned-good droid.
I feel like I’ve probably spoiled too much already but to do a play-by-play of the actual sequence of events is to do it an injustice. I knew so little going in and yet expected so much. I think it actually met those expectations, perhaps in a different way. The ride technology alone still blows my mind, I probably love the geeky side of that most of all. Watching the dance of the trackless vehicles has always been a firm favourite of mine, but to see it in this context with all the other cool stuff going on is…
Live blaster holes in the ceiling, sets of epic magnitude and visuals, casually driving into an elevator, animatronics creating legit tension, the pacing of the thrills, casually turning into an escape pod simulator and ENDING OUTSIDE.
Once again it’s far too much to take in, especially off the lethargy of a near three hour wait, though I think that adds to the mystique somewhat.
It is, technically and by pretty much all other measures, by far the best dark ride I’ve ever experienced or even hoped to witness. But it left a void. It didn’t warm my heart. It didn’t even come with a cup of tea.
Something I learned after we were done is that the ride has several B-mode moments allowing it to continue operating while some of the more advanced effects are temporarily broken. Without this knowledge I noticed two of the three Bs we had on our cycle, in moments that felt a little off:
1. Being chased into an elevator with a lightsaber, only to then have a crude screen of what looked like nothing more than welding in the ceiling. 2. Having that chase then abandoned, only for Kylo to be crudely hovering outside in space in his pointy Tie-Fighter trying to shoot us through a window and getting taken out by random crossfire – our victory moment.
The part I didn’t notice is that some giant cannons firing out into space are supposed to be physically recoiling as the little droid dodges our way past them.
Once again though, the promise of it being even more life-changing next time, that’s reason to come back and queue again, right?
With over half the day gone and no sign of a lull in the crowds, it was time to get a little tactical and hit all of our intended attractions in order of shortest queue first, to try and maximise any and every opportunity. This moment was punctuated with some comedy in the form of a man screaming “90 minutes?!…………… and then what?!” at his family beneath the entrance to Toy Story Midway Meh-nia. Glad we don’t need that one.
For us it begain with a mere 70 mins for Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railway, a ride that was described to me as the sleeper hit of the trip.
And it was. I’d basically barely even heard of this thing, along with not knowing this building was here, how was I supposed to know what it contained? The attraction name, to me, had conjured images of a powered coaster, an indoor Casey Jr. at best.
So what a pleasant surprise it was to find an elaborate cartoon preshow that turns into a ‘how the hell did they do that?’ visual effect. Guests then enter into the cartoon for the remainder of the queue and it gets a whole lot wackier from there.
I was trying to soak up the moment at the air gates when the ‘train’ pulled in towards us. There’s nothing joining this train together. Is this yet more tantalising trackless dark ride tech? Yes it is. This thing is like Hunny Hunt x1000 for being weird and wonderful and once again there’s no way I can do it justice with words. Oh, and it’s violent too. The power of those vehicles scares me. Much love for this attraction.
Something slightly less high tech was waiting around the corner in the form of #1 Rock’n’Roller Coaster. This sucked so bad, but the cred withdrawal was seeping in. Two hours for a trash clone. And my feet hurt. I think we got to skip the preshow in Paris, and good, because it wasn’t needed. I just don’t get on with this thing. At least the speakers weren’t broken this time, but I spent half the ride thinking about how it’s not loud enough for a ‘rock concert’ to really get you in the mood it’s going for and the other half thinking ‘this layout is mostly right turns’. It was an endurance at worst, a relief to sit down for two minutes at best.
By now the sun had long gone of course, leaving time only to complete the +1s of the park. #2 Slinky Dog Dash was better than I was expecting to be fair to him. I even liked the theming details, initially only really expecting ‘Toy Story = roller coaster = money’ and instead being continuously shown that Andy was gifted a backyard coaster kit from Mack Rides, designed it all carefully and runs his dog around it.
The layout is fun, has an interesting flow and some poppy moments in the first half. Usually pausing on the second launch would irk me, but he does more with it and backs up a bit, building the tension with various effects before bursting up into a high section consisting entirely of amusingly sequential hills. Good variety, great family ride.
With that success we were left with only one major hole from the day, a certain ride that had also been attracting eye-watering wait times due to what appeared to be capacity issues. I suppose the other hole, though it was fully expected, was the lack of a Fantasmic show to end on. Instead there was a half-baked attempt at projections and fireworks on a central building, including my old mate Coco again. Not seen that before.
As we headed out once again to our inconveniently located shuttle bus at the front of Epcot, there was a transport conundrum. In the morning the driver had been ranting on about how the bus system was broken and how it takes people two and a half hours to get to Hollywood Studios and Animal Kingdom from the TTC these days. It felt like scare tactics in order to tout for a few tips really, which we had in fact taken advantage of that morning to save precious Star Wars time.
However, on reaching the official Disney man at the HS bus station he loudly and proudly declared that ‘we don’t do buses to Epcot’ despite literally standing in front of a sign saying where to get the bus to Epcot. Instead we were recommended the cable car system that runs, in a roundabout way, to the bottom of the park, via various resorts and hotels.
This was rather fun in itself, bouncing between different areas we hadn’t seen in the dark and eventually landing sort of where we needed to be, except it was the entirely wrong end of the park. Everyone was leaving said park after their own night time spectacular and the cable car drops you just outside of the security entrance, with the masses surging straight towards us.
We can get in though, I assume? The question was asked to a nearby staff member. “Oh… you can’t really go through the park to the bus station from here, you’d probably have to get on your knees and beg for them to even let you in. The best way from here? I’d probably take an uber.” From the park, to the park. Huh.
Well we went to security anyway and were waved straight in as though it was the norm, walked straight through the park as though it was the norm and got to bus with time so spare. Winging it was still paying off, with or without their help.
There, I’ve spent longer writing about buses than I have about the most advanced ride in history. Entertainment.
Florida. They’ve got rides right? I’m sure you’ve never heard about them before.
For someone in the unhealthy realm of four-figures, it always felt pretty weird that I’d not yet visited the theme park capital of the world. Well now I have. I guess that’s one less thing to look forward to in life.
Let’s get straight to it.
Day 0 – Travel
Not a huge amount to tell here. We landed in Miami because the car hire was way cheaper, missed the two creds at Uncle Bernie’s by a few minutes (as was fully expected) and then drove the wholly unremarkable Kia Optima for four wholy unremarkable hours up to Orlando, where we were then based for the entire trip.
Day 1 – Magic Kingdom
The hotel resort in question had some shuttle buses to the parks, albeit not entirely useful ones. Nevertheless we attempted to make the most of them in lieu of paying for parking every single day and our first experience with the system took us to the Transportation and Ticket Centre (TTC) just over an hour after park opening, from which the Monorail for either Magic Kingdom or Epcot can be accessed. We had opted to start with the quintessential Disney experience that is MK, as I entered their final resort in my now complete collection.
I’ll head this up with one more weigh-in to all the negativity I see around the painful planning required for Disney parks, Florida in particular, that unfortunately seems to put some people off ever visiting. We made very little effort to plan anything about these parks other than a swiftly jotted down list of attractions that were considered must-do. Admittedly the burden on certain days was eased by having experienced cloned attractions before and deciding they didn’t need another go here, but by the same measure I’m well known for being the type of person who won’t say no to an hour’s queue for a Vekoma junior just to get that sweet, sweet +1. All I’ll say is that with minimum thought, a little common sense and some general theme-parking experience, it was a very rewarding, relaxing and virtually stress-free experience. No fast track. No genies. No reservations. No rope drops. No hassle. Alright, some hassle.
And here it is.
Tick.
First ride of the trip was the Carousel of Progress. This I knew nothing about, so it was cool to kick things off with that old school vibe from a unique attraction with a rich history that feels both dated and charming, rather than Peter Pan dark ride #47.
For the uninitiated like myself, you sit in a big room that rotates from scene to scene about once every 5 minutes, each one containing a look at what life was like throughout different eras, narrated by the same animatronic family each time and interluded by a catchy, cheesy tune about a great big beautiful tomorrow shining at the end of every day. What’s not to love?
As soon as that was done, the rain started chucking down and we attempted to shelter in #1 Space Mountain, failing to do so as the hour queue put itself well into the outdoors. Umbrella in hand, it was a steady and relatively dry shuffle into the indoors and eventually onto the first of the two tracks.
I loved the ride system itself. Those old single-file, bobsled style trains on the janky tubular track, much like a distant Matterhorn cousin. For a coaster with such low speed, it creates a great sense of illusion as you blast around in the dark in any unpredictable direction. The highlights were actually the susprise jolts into and out of the various block sections. Sadly the lack of ambience in both music and visuals was similar to that of how we experienced the Tokyo version, rather than the epic sound and spectacle I found in others. I expect it to place squarely in the middle of the Space Mountain pack if I ever manage to not get spited by Jules Verne.
Next up was a ride on the Peoplemover, a cool little LSM train journey around Tomorrowland, including inside the buildings of other attractions, though you don’t get to see a whole lot.
Tron though, get excited.
Finally, I finally got to do Haunted Mansion without it having a holiday layover. It’s a such a classic attraction as is, though the queue after the lift is always a bit stewy. It also stopped for a long time in the dining room, in silence, reducing the atmosphere somewhat. I’m thinking Phantom Manor is still better.
Not least for having a slightly more imposing presence.
Something else that Paris does best is #2 Big Thunder Mountain, though I can’t deny the good times these rides always bring.
What they don’t have however is a Country Bear Jamboree. This animatronic based show of bears singing was nothing short of genius.
Heading back across the park and dodging yet more rain, we checked out the Little Mermaid’s take on an omnimover. It wasn’t new to me, but has a vastly more impressive exterior and queueline.
No longer able to avoid the weather any longer, as the circus part of the park was due to close early, it was time to suck up the queue for #3 Barnstormer. It was wet, it was poor, especially for a Disney park. At least some of their other baby creds look the part.
With cred hunting still being at the forefront of our minds, we had to dust off the other side of #4 Space Mountain next. Not that it didn’t warrant a reride anyway. It’s potentially the best thing here. Had to ask the cheeky question at the batch point to a host who treated it like a covert operation, but it was all good.
And then, to complete the quest, things got rather grim. The longest wait of the day was for the #5 Seven Dwarves Mine Train, essentially a lesser Big Thunder Mountain and a clone I had walked straight onto in the past (courtesy of a free fast pass, ah the good old days). The queue ground to an absolute grinding halt thanks to a multitude of Genie users, in the worst cases only batching four standby riders at a time, across two trains. It’s consistently the most popular ride of the park right now and yet entirely unimpressive, though I hear I expect too much.
Coasters complete, there was time for one cheeky walk on lap of yet another Pirates of the Caribbean, though they were playing scare tactics and keeping it posted at 30 mins. Money? Probably. The drop didn’t feel as big, but that pirate ship scene astounds me every time.
Finally it was our turn to find a spot amongst the masses for the obligatory night time spectacular. It was mysteriously delayed for 10 minutes just as the crescendo happened, which caused mass confusion amongst the masses. They’ve become a mixed bag over the years, ranging from complete shambles to life-altering. This, brand new one I believe, was almost back to old form with the visuals. I wasn’t all in with the music choices however and it felt more like a highlight reel than ever before, taking the briefest of pauses to deal with each tune rather than ever getting into the meat of the song, which I would have particularly enjoyed on the Moana and Frozen 2 numbers. That Coco kid was grinding on me though, haven’t seen the last of him.
A satisfying end to the day at the very least, as was the impressive spectacle of how the monorail system chews through 50,000 people all leaving the park at once. We left the crowds at the TTC however, in order to get our hotel shuttle which was, inconveniently, only ever running from the bus station at Epcot each evening. This involved taking the other monorail, which strays a little too far into the park, purely for the benefit of a bit of sightseeing. Looks nice and all, but not when you’re in a hurry, which we certainly were due to the unexpected pause in proceedings. Some sprinting ensued in order to flag the man down at the last second, much to the surprise of the remaining stragglers. Still got it.
At last we reach the end of this 50 year series. Things have come an extremely long way from Gold Rusher in 1971. It’s not an entirely happy ending though. Of course with a worldwide pandemic going on, rollercoaster construction took a significant downturn with around 40% less opening across the planet compared to the previous year. There were still a surprisingly high quantity of new builds in historical terms however, matching the same sort of numbers we were seeing just a decade ago. The hardest hit were some of the most major projects which would have been planned out for several years, with many either deciding or being forced to defer and this is also evident in the overall quality of the lineup today.
The other issue here is that I barely even have 10 rides to my name that were built in 2020. Both the travel restrictions and recency of the builds mean I simply haven’t had the chance to seek enough of these out. In fact it’s a good thing that I have dragged this series on so long now, with just under a week until I ride my first new for 2022 coaster, as I wouldn’t even have been able to fill the list back when this idea all started.
#10 Erdbeer Raupenbahn – Karls Erlebnis-Dorf Koserow/Karls Erlebnis-Dorf Zirkow (Germany)
You know it’s a desperate situation when the list begins with a children’s coaster, the ubiquitous Wacky Worm no less. We haven’t started with something of this scale since 1996. These strawberry flavoured worms are particularly fine examples of the model and we had a great and memorable day riding four of them at different Karls parks in Germany over many, many miles.
#9 Hummel Brummel – Schwaben Park (Germany)
I’d be half tempted to put the next two behind the worm, but I have to at least acknowledge that they offer a rarer experience in the grand scheme of things. I didn’t get the point of Hummel Brummel and I’d also struggle to call it a rollercoaster with the way it behaves. Better stop talking about it before I do myself out of a cred.
#8 Roller Ball – Wiener Prater (Austria)
And while these are a bit more legit, they’re just so dull. Controlled braking at every turn sucks the life out of what very little movement is going on anyway. I think inherently there’s nothing to be done for them without introducing another dimension, but other rides have those anyway.
#7 Max + Moritz – Efteling (Netherlands)
Disappointing, for Efteling, I have to say. While it was nice to see the comeback of the Mack powered coaster, I feel like nothing was done here to progress it forwards in any way, with some very lacklustre layout design and not even what appeared to be good attention to the way that this pair duels. Instead it relies solely on the charms of station theming and onboard audio, which are undeniably the saviours here.
#6 Volldampf – Erlebnispark Tripsdrill (Germany)
This goat paid plenty of attention to interaction in the way that it weaves through the layout of the adjacent suspended coaster and even bursts through it’s roof at the end (not that there was a roof at my time of riding). I rather enjoyed the more linear approach to the junior boomerang design here, favouring those humps and bumps, particularly in the backwards direction, over drawn out turns.
#5 Wakala – Bellewaerde (Belgium)
This ride had such a sense of fun to it, from the catchy dispatch theme to the way it teasingly accelerates up the second lift hill. There’s plenty going on here, from weird and wonky track elements to the tricks at the end with a reverse spike and switch track. A real crowd pleaser and another fine example of Gerstlauer continuing to nail these lower-key installations.
The dawn of the Vekoma Suspended Thrill Coaster conjured up many dreams of a world entering a new age, one in which we no longer had to live in fear of their dreaded Suspended Looping Coaster. This first example wasn’t quite pitched at the same level of extremity however and seems more suited to bridge the gap between their increasingly popular family model. The lap bars are highly welcome of course and it has some decently forceful moments, though the inverion sequence is rather repetitive and struggles to let the ride break away from that meandering feeling.
#3 Vertika – La Récré des 3 Curés (France)
It was great to see a new Eurofighter layout appear out of nowhere and put this little known French park on the map for us. It did leave me wondering why lap bars aren’t default on these models now as we certainly know they are possible. Aside from that minor misfortune, Vertika is a great and re-rideable coaster with a well rounded selection of elements.
#2 Gesengte Sau – Wiener Prater (Austria)
One of the finest Gerstlauer Bobsled creations to date combines a fun and quirky theme with a stacked compact layout full of everything you could wish for from one of these. A true gem in an overwhelmingly underwhelming lineup of coasters at Wiener Prater and a real surprise hit.
#1 F.L.Y. – Phantasialand (Germany)
And so Vekoma are getting their first win since 1992, once again spurred on by the surroundings. While this was nowhere near as effective of a ride layout as I had hoped it would be, I can’t deny the sheer spectacle of F.L.Y., nor how much I enjoyed witnessing the technology at play. The way the trains transition themselves from loading to flying and vice versa is totally inspired and I have to admit it somewhat blew my mind. I’m glad the boundaries have been pushed, but I think the limiting factor here was the setting. Being yet another heavily themed Phantasialand multi-launch coaster left no room for the types of elements I love to see on other flying coasters and so we basically got Taron again, in a less comfortable format. What a glowing review for the best coaster of the year (for now), had to end the series in style!
It’s interesting that in the absence of any of the familiar manufacturers we’ve seen at the business end of this series, Vekoma and Gerstlauer were doing all the heavy lifting. The two safe bets for the year however were the big B&Ms, Candymonium and Orion. Though I already have experience with loving the layout of Forest Predator, the fact that it has backwards seats could be totally game changing. I still can’t quite believe that I had planned to ride Launch Roller Coaster during a trip in 2018 and it has taken until now, of all years, to actually open. These S&S air launchers with actual layouts are usually the bomb. It’s hard not to remember the time when speculation said that Pitts Special was a layout extension for Junker and not a coaster in it’s own right. Need to see what that’s all about. Shred the Sewers snuck up out of nowhere, can’t say no to an Intamin launch coaster with the added bonus of that indoor interaction. Texas Stingray was the only wooden coaster able to open as far as I’m aware, good old GCI. The construction of West Coast Racers was the reason I missed a different GCI during my visit to Magic Mountain, so more than double the revenge to have there with these exciting looking racing coasters. Wrath of Zeus is yet another of these amazing looking Vekomas that I will always have my doubts about now, but it won’t stop me from trying.
I’m sure plenty of that lot would make a reasonably solid 10 to be fair, I’ll be sure to revisit this particular list at some point, along with any others that might see a significant change in the years to come. It’s been fun.
The end is in sight and this feels like the last great year, partly because I don’t appear to have a large enough sample size for 2020 yet and partly because, well, you know… This is a very, very solid list at the very top, proving yet again that this really is a magical era we’re living in right now, when it comes to the construction of coasters at least.
#10 Fury – Bobbejaanland (Belgium)
The novelty of being able to choose a backwards facing ride on this Gerstlauer Infinity was easily the most exciting thing about it for me. That very first lap, launching into the unknown and unable to see what was coming, was a rather special experience. It’s not their finest of layouts but it delivers a fun, mixed bag in an impressively tight footprint and was definitely another step towards a promising future for the park.
Vekoma’s Space Warp model debuted as a compact launch coaster in 2015 at Energylandia, Poland. By 2019, Chinese theme park chain Fantawild had taken on several more for a number of their newly built properties – with 2 opening in the same year. There were a couple of key differences in the design, both in that Celestial Gauntlet uses a conventional lift hill and first drop for it’s momentum and the final section of humps and bumps was extended around some extra corners in order to allow for some additional interaction with theming. I found it a far more satisfying ride than Formula for those two reasons, the little kick off the top of the lift adds a fun moment and of course a longer ride of this style is generally a better ride.
#8 Dynamite – Freizeitpark Plohn (Germany)
But very short and punchy rides can have a charm of their own. I was initially a little disappointed to learn that Dynamite would be far more scaled back than the original Mack BigDipper, Lost Gravity. While it did always leave me wanting more after each lap, the elements it does have are executed brilliantly, with powerful bursts of airtime in unexpected places and a satisfying set of inversions.
#7 Mystic – Walibi Rhône-Alpes (France)
These compact designs were really on a roll this year, perhaps showing a direction in which the industry is headed – finding new ways to bring amazing thrills into overcrowded spaces. I’m all for it when the result is anything like Mystic. It’s a vicious combination of the many things Gerstlauer do really well, from that awesome first drop to the completely ridiculous inverted spike.
#6 Dueling Dragons (Invert) – Guangzhou Sunac Land (China)
One of the more frustrating encounters of my coaster career so far was with this thing. You can certainly appreciate the majesty and ambition of a dueling Intamin triple-launch coaster that consists of both a sit-down train and an inverted train, along with that strikingly massive loop structure. Visiting just 6 months after opening however had me finding that they generally don’t tend to bother operating both simultaneously, in typical Chinese park fashion. In fact, where they used to at least alternate between the two ride systems during the day, this policy had also been abandoned embarassingly early into the operating life of Dueling Dragons. But, hey, I got to ride the invert at least (not through lack of trying with the other, including rearranging the entire trip and wasting valuable time) and it was pretty amazing. I look forward to Intamin doing more to revitalise this ride type now that it has those amazing lap bars, just perhaps not at a Sunac park next time?
#5 Copperhead Strike – Carowinds (USA)
More launches, more mesmerising mixtures of airtime and inversions, it all feels so 2019. While I’d much rather some parks would throw a ton more money at Mack Rides when asking them to build a multi-launch coaster, this relatively baby version is still a really satisfying ride that brings a lot to the table, including bags of character and that silly set of LSMs over a hill.
#4 Untamed – Walibi Holland (Netherlands)
Look who’s back and (mostly) dominating the top spots for another year. Europe’s second RMC creation is a lot more representative of their key skills than I found Wildfire to be, with that highly refined blend of quirky inversions and out of this world airtime. I wasn’t quite as enthralled by Untamed as I would have liked to have been, certainly not as much as others. To me it was mid-pack for this type of ride, which of course still means world class and a personal top 25, I just had a couple of meaningless nitpicks with a few moments that didn’t quite land and that somewhat harder to define feature I call a lack of character.
#3 Zadra – Energylandia (Poland)
Europe’s 3rd RMC followed hot on Untamed’s heels and went a lot harder and faster with all that it does. That makes Zadra top tier to me, it comes with that extra aggression that really takes your breath away during certain moments of the ride and combines many of the best features or inspirations from other creations that came before it.
#2 Hakugei – Nagashima Spa Land (Japan)
Asia’s 1st RMC (they really were spreading out this year) was even better still, by a whisker. It goes on a little longer, has a couple more elements that I completely adore and felt like a slightly better all round package, in my head at least. My heart tells me that I’m less emotionally attached to Hakugei however, though that may be the circumstances of the park talking. Which is ridiculous because it’s Japan, it just shouldn’t be that way.
#1 Taiga – Linnanmäki (Finland)
And so we head over to Finland for my #1 pick. Taiga had all the signs of something special for me, the combination of a Nordic city park, a hillside and an impressive multi-launch coaster. This time it was Intamin taking the reins and you have to believe that it crossed someone’s mind during the process that it was setting out to beat rival Helix at it’s own game. It didn’t manage that for me, but it certainly gave one of the best rides I’ve ever experienced anyway and really highlighted to me how much these multi-launchers really are ‘my kinda coaster’.
More? Surely not. I’m thinking the top 4 would be rather hard to crack at this stage but there’s plenty of room for movement at the lower end.
The fact that I have to put the other side of Dueling Dragons here irks me to no end, but as an individual experience it could easily be a contender for the list as well given the ride type and inherent similarities with the Invert side. Of course if I’m ever fortunate to catch both of them running together it could be an entirely different story with that extra enhancement of interaction. Need I say anything more than look at the size of this wing coaster, Falcon. Also more from B&M and China where that came from, with the catchily titled Flight of the Himalayan Eagle Music Roller Coaster It wasn’t just Happy Valley coming up with long names though, with famed Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure also bursting onto the scene. I was wondering where the Gravity Group had got to this year, bit of a quiet one with only Kentucky Flyer for me to look forward to. It took a long time for the revitalised S&S air launch coaster designs to escape China, but we finally got one with Maxx Force. It seems they still didn’t manage to do a huge amount with it, but I really want to try it and see. An even more intriguing development also from S&S was Steel Curtain however, and the simple fact of not really knowing how this sort of thing will ride excites me more than most. Because when I look at something like Yukon Striker, I feel like I’ve already been on it and could say exactly what it will be like. But it’ll still be good.
Another incredible year on the cards and it feels like a surprisingly long time ago to me. I suppose with all the mess that has been going on recently, those care free travel times that I associate with 2018 are nothing but a distant memory. The 10 today are a strong showing from pretty much all of the most well established ride designers in these lists by now, a well rounded bunch with plenty to offer.
There was another surge in B&M wing coaster popularity and it was a big year for the manufacturer all round, with an impressive 7 coaster installations worldwide, their most since 2002. China continues to lead the charge in filling those order books and an all-new-for-2018 park in the gorgeous Yunnan Province opted for this striking design as their star attraction. It’s a mostly graceful experience with some particularly drawn out inversion-based thrills that is only enhanced by some impressive and ambitious theming, which we’ve come to expect by default from Chinese parks by now.
#9 Fēnix – Toverland (Netherlands)
Over in Europe, this up and coming Dutch park had lofty ambitions of their own and it was quite the surprise when Toverland announced that they were going for such a premium product. The coaster itself and the new land in which it resides was a stunning achievement, though for some reason I can’t stop thinking about how great the queueline was.
#8 HangTime – Knott’s Berry Farm (USA)
My primary fondness from this ride comes with the blatantly obvious way in which it shows off the effects of a minimalist restraint. Most of the namesake ‘hang’ in the ride comes from a holding brake that follows the vertical lift hill, which points riders down towards the ground at an impressively steep angle, with nothing holding them in place but a comfy lap bar. It’s a wonderful feeling of freedom that I hope to see a lot more of in future.
#7 Valkyria – Liseberg (Sweden)
Case in point with the B&M dive coaster, although they’ve managed to dominate the holding brake game over the years with their near-vertical first drops. Vests leave a little to be desired in comparison to the above, but the subsequent coaster of Valkyria is full on, fantastic and, for me, quite a leap forward for this ride type.
#6 Wood Express – Parc Saint Paul (France)
The Gravity Group continued to defy gravity with their compact designs. A mere 50ft of height on Wood Express is somehow able to offer a fast paced, highly varied and thrilling ride with far more airtime than seems physically possible.
#5 Icon – Blackpool Pleasure Beach (UK)
2018 was a big year for the UK with not one, but two major attractions that were real head turners and had the potential to make a major difference to the local amusement park landscape. We may be a bit of a miserable and spoiled bunch, but it felt like that hadn’t really happened since the ’90s. Icon was the standout for me, comfortably cementing itself as my favourite coaster on home turf, earning such strong praise as ‘the only one I want to go back for’.
#4 Railblazer – California’s Great America
Meanwhile America were being treated to their usual slew of world class attractions, mostly at the hands of RMC when we look at 2018. This Raptor design was like nothing we had seen before, a revolutionary ride system that also holds it’s own amongst the best of the best in the world rather than just being a bit of a quirk. Straddling the single-rail track and being subjected to some of the manufacturer’s finest forces is a surreal experience, and a welcome one.
#3 Twisted Cyclone – Six Flags Over Georgia (USA)
This might well have been the year that secured them with true legendary status as manufacturers. Since 2011 it had seemed that they could do no wrong and this was also their busiest year to date. Comparatively, Twisted Cyclone is tiny, but that doesn’t stop it from treating you to a whole host of amazing manouevres throughout the slightly stunted ride time.
#2 Hyperion – Energylandia (Poland)
Almost all quiet on the Intamin front, but they went and knocked out something extra special in Poland. What has quickly become known as the world’s fastest growing amusement park really stepped their game up by splashing out on a 250ft hyper coaster that really put them on the map. The trains come with a similar winged seating design to that of Intamin’sfinest and though it doesn’t quite produce the same extremes as those, it’s easily one of Europe’s best.
#1 Twisted Timbers – Kings Dominion (USA)
The bigger of the Twisted twins (no, not these) was superior for me. Unlike the cyclone, the timbers have plenty of prime ride time that is packed with some really powerful punches. The sequence of 3 camelbacks is one of the most sublime moments I can think of on any coaster and there’s so many more surprises along the way with this masterful design.
Elsewhere I can see that there are a few other potential threats. The glaring hole in this list is of course Steel Vengeance, which has become ubiquitous with the phrase ‘best rollercoaster in the world’. As if RMC didn’t dominate the year enough already, surely their largest and most popular creation yet will deliver the knockout blow when I finally get around to it. Heaven’s Wing is yet another (Chinese) B&M wing coaster with at least as much potential as the others already present. I probably should mention Hyper Coaster, although I feel like I wouldn’t include it in the list for being a clone in this hotly contested era, even if it is a particularly spectacular one. I already applied the same (flawed) logic to my favourite Jungle Trailblazer that was copied this year. Steel Dolphin looks like a lot of fun, on the smaller end of the Intamin multi-launch scale. I don’t think they can do much wrong with that hardware at this stage. I don’t know if I want Time Traveler more or less, now that I’ve experienced the extremes of the Mack Xtreme Spinner first hand. Surely it can’t be game-changing for me twice in a row. Even if it can’t live up to the follow up, it will undoubtedly be a quality ride.
It’s been fascinating to see the ebb and flow in how strong the lineups have been over the years and that’s as apparent as ever coming off the back of what I considered to be the greatest year of all. 2017 looks good, but it’s nowhere near in the same league. Of course it’s never been the full sample size in any of these as I haven’t (yet) ridden them all, but there appears to only be a handful of potentials in each list over the most recent years and, from my humble opinion, never a group that can fully change the landscape of success in any given year, at least in a way that threatens that sacred 2016.
#10 Arashi – Nagashima Spa Land (Japan)
As evidenced by starting with a prolific clone. Threemore ofthese opened at Six Flags parks in the very same year. To be fair to Arashi it stands head and shoulders above the others of this model I have experienced and I probably wouldn’t mention it otherwise. Saying that, yet another Mega-Lite opened this year that could do rather well in this list, it just isn’t the best example of one. I know, I’m inconsistent, like them. There appears to be a huge scope for altering the ride intensity on S&S Free Spins by means of magnetic fins that affect the namesake free-spinning. This Japanese terror is turned up to 11 and is by far one of the most intense and scary pieces of hardware I’ve come across. It takes a lot for a ride to get me nervous these days, especially after a few goes. I respect that, a lot.
#9 Pégase Express – Parc Astérix (France)
These Gerstlauer family launch coasters are about as premium as you can get when it comes to a milder thrill package. They’re drastically underutilised around the world in lieu of generic stock models with an obvious ‘that’ll do’ attitude to appease younger audiences. While I can’t comment on the business perspective of this, I can say that the hardware lends itself so well to inspiration and sheer joy. The comfy trains and versatility of lift hills, launches, forwards and backwards travel tend to go hand in hand with great story telling and really make these a cut about the rest.
I was heartbroken to find that this was by far the weakest of the Jungle Trailblazers, not only through the amount of effort required but also because it’s the only installation so far I’ve managed to drag Mega-Lite along to, after raving to him about these coasters so much. It let me down, the pacing is all over the place and it doesn’t carry itself well over at least 75% of the hills. But that’s all relative, this is good for a woodie, just not for a Gravity.
#7 Lech Coaster – Legendia (Poland)
I want to love this thing, I really do. It’s so visually appealing and there’s that undeniable aura of intrigue around these ‘new-age’ Vekomas that understandably makes you want to elevate your opinions of them, if only in stark contrast to what the manufacturer used to be like. That’s not fair though. Many of the other major manufacturers have come out with some trash over the years, but they dusted themselves off and honed their craft over time, rather than doubling down on it for at least a couple of decades. Again this isn’t business advice, I’m sure it worked very well for them, it’s just my battle scars talking.
#6 Gold Rush – Slagharen (Netherlands)
2017 appears to be defined by the triple launch coaster. After Intamin showed it off in a big way last year (although that one only achieved 10th in its list, it comfortably beats all of the ones here today), several other familiar manufacturers showed their hand with something a little more compact. Gold Rush is great for the footprint, the use of the dive loop element for the backwards section is great fun, the oddly shaped top hat is surprisingly potent and it’s interesting how Gerstlauer kept it simple with a closed circuit layout – no clever switch tracks.
#5 Star Trek: Operation Enterprise – Movie Park Germany
Mack also had a dabble at this new triple launch trend and while a quality package, it’s not a patch on what they can really do with the hardware. It has some great moments, but all feels suboptimal even from the story-telling perspective.
#4 Capitol Bullet Train – Motiongate (UAE)
In fact, I could say the exact same thing for this Mack triple launch too, they’re almost inseparable in terms of ride quality even though the elements are all rather different. It’s interesting how they both ended up representing major media franchises and just didn’t quite pull off a cohesive themed experience with their hardware. While slightly shorter, this one has a couple more powerful moments for me.
#3 Flying Wing Coaster – Happy Valley Chongqing (China)
I’d always liked the look of this B&M wing coaster, if only for the dinosaur themed trains. I love it when rides have a face, it can’t help but add a sense of character. I was skeptical about the supposed ‘airtime hill’ on this layout, given the nature of the vest restraints, and rightly so. What I didn’t expect however was how ridiculously intense this ride would be, well up there with the finest Inverts and even a few Flyers. The clever use of terrain in the layout had me seeing stars, and I loved it. There’s now a clone of this at another Happy Valley park and it has some backwards seats! I’d almost forgotten how much I need that in my life.
#2 Jungle Dragon – Happy Valley Chongqing (China)
A double podium finish for this park, pretty impressive stuff. I had a wild range of emotions throughout my experience with Jungle Dragon, initially not knowing anything about it, visually seeing that it looked very much like my #1 woodie, not really loving it that much, then forever growing to appreciate it more and more as time goes on. It’s not a patch on GCI’s best, for sure, yet it comfortably sits above pretty much everything else they’ve done. I find that odd, but endearing.
#1 DC Rivals Hypercoaster – Warner Bros. Movie World (Australia)
Without a second thought, this wins the year. Facing forwards it’s one of the best hyper coasters around, with a mix of powerful airtime and many other standout forces. The ride is of course legendary for that back row of backwards facing seats and I can’t even begin to describe how much that does for the experience, though I gave it a good go here. Absolute world class ride, put the entire southern hemisphere on the map for the coaster scene, best in 2017.
I feel like a few honourable mentions are due this year, I really could have picked many things for the bottom two thirds of this list as they all fall into that great, but not game-changing category.
Madagascar Mad Pursuit is a lot of fun, the indoor aspect and theming attempts did a lot for it, though it doesn’t quite give off that air of fine craftmanship like Pégase Express. From the same park, Dragon Gliders could well have podiumed here for how much I love it, but it doesn’t feel fair to rate it as a coaster when the dark ride aspect does all the heavy lifting. Red Force is the potential elephant in the room. While I appreciate it a lot more than I believed I would, those layouts just don’t really do it for me. GCI had a solid year in the medium sized range with both Heidi (but it’s a clone) and Invadr. The less honourable mention goes to Great Desert Rally, which broke the national streak, badly.
Outside of what I’ve ridden, here’s how things stand.
GaleForce looks insane, yet another contributor to the triple launch league. That compact goodness combined with a style of ride that S&S haven’t really touched before is extremely intriguing to me. I hope Mine Blower will be the redeemer for the Gravity Group this year, it looks like a real pocket rocket that should be right up my street. Mystic Timbers is one of the last great GCIs I need to knock off. It appears to be rather highly regarded, but can it compete with the Chinese tier? Talking of China, I don’t expect great things but I really want to try Snow Mountain Racer, a Jinma Rides (Golden Horse) mine train with a dark ride section and a couple of other tricks up its sleeve. For, you know, research. Wave Breaker: The Rescue Coaster could be solid based on it’s type, I do love a good Intamin family launch. Haven’t heard much about it really.
And that’s it for now. Like I said at the start – the list could change for sure, but how it stacks up against other years seems pretty set in stone at this point. Just goes to show how much of a marvel 2016 was.
If 2015 was the year of superlatives then I don’t even know what to say about this one. It’s the year to end all years as far as I’m concered, we’ve not seen a lineup this strong before, or since (spoilers), at least in terms of rides I’ve managed to experience. We begin the countdown immediately in my personal top 40, which means we’re looking at ten rides here inside what I consider to be the best ~3.5% of coasters in the world. Something was definitely in the air.
#10 Soaring with Dragon – Hefei Sunac Land (China)
Including this dragon, soaring about through ridiculously large inversions and non-inversions. In a year that saw Intamin step their LSM-launch game up like never before, Soaring with Dragon was one of the first major coasters to show off clever switch tracks and triple launch techniques in the name of both space saving and visual spectacle. The result is a rather special blend of forces that should always keep you coming back for more.
#9 Coaster through the Clouds – Nanchang Sunac Land (China)
Sunac (Wanda at the time) were a pretty major contributor to this big boom, opening both the Hefei park and this revamp of an existing park in Nanchang with some massive headline attractions within a very short time frame. Intamin were the go-to manufacturer again and created this beast, China’s tallest and fastest coaster to date. Aside from the Megalite model, we hadn’t really seen anything from their Mega Coaster product range for a good 15 years, and it was a welcome return. That first drop is ridiculous and some of the airtime moments on this ride are obscene.
Over in Europe we experienced a fairly momentous occasion, the first contribution from game changing coaster creators Rocky Mountain Construction, outside of America. No one would have expected this to go to a remote zoo in Sweden, a place that most ride or park enthusiasts had likely never heard of, but it certainly put Kolmården on the map. I personally followed the construction of this ride more closely than perhaps any other attraction to date and this eventually came back to sting us quite badly when it didn’t open on time. I’ve generally paid less attention to things until I’m actually on them, ever since that experience, so it will always be remembered for that, perhaps even moreso than for being my first RMC. Which, while not the best the manufacturer has to offer, is an incredible ride.
#7 Joker – Six Flags Discovery Kingdom (USA)
It was a busy year for RMC openings, their second most hectic to date in fact, yet another solid contributor to this stacked year. While Joker has none of the visual spectacle and wonder of Wildfire, I marginally preferred the ride experience for being truer to what these hybrid coasters do better than pretty much anyone else in the world – that non-stop beautiful blend of interesting inversions and amazing airtime. On my journey through rides from this manufacturer, this was a far more representative taste of things to come.
We must have known we were in for something special this year when, on New Year’s day no less, this opens. Mack Rides also performed a rare breaking of the 200ft barrier in China and it was a first for the manufacturer, putting that wonderful train design to yet more fantastic use. Claims to the world’s biggest loop were thrown around a lot in this era and while this one is pretty damn amazing, it’s the complete package of the ride layout that does it for me. Hyper coasters that mix it up with far more than just big hills are right up my street and Flash was a real masterclass of an early example for that.
#5 Flying Dinosaur – Universal Studios Japan
While they quite often get an easy pass in these lists by the very nature of their existence, the legends that are Bolliger & Mabillard had to bring their A-game to even get noticed by me in the 2016 lineup. And they certainly did that, reaching what I currently consider to be the pinnacle design of their most exciting ride type. Competition is fierce in the styles of attraction we’ve seen so far today, but B&M stand entirely alone when it comes to Flying coasters. The dinosaur uses a brutal combination of elements that do all manner of terrible things to your body, and that’s why I love it. There’s very few places in the world, if any, where you can get that type of experience.
The vicious and mesmerising cries of the new Intamin LSM launch system were heard for the first time in more than one corner of the world this year. Taron uses it twice over, to great effect and as if I didn’t already have enough reason to love multi-launch coasters, I fell hard for this one too. It’s one of the most alluring designs in the world of amusements, not least helped along by the almost unprecedented levels of theming that surrounds such a significantly-sized attraction. True bucket list material.
#3 Lightning Rod – Dollywood (USA)
The launches keep on coming, even where you don’t anticipate them, but don’t expect them to work all of the time. You can no longer ‘peel out on the world’s fastest wooden rollercoaster’ like you could in 2016 because, due to a recent track overhaul, those that care about such things have decided that Lightning Rod can’t be classified as wooden any more. It shouldn’t matter, I’m sure it’s still the ridiculous romp it always was, yet another RMC for the list with a gorgeous setting and some astounding features. This one doesn’t even need to invert, it simply blasts you with airtime again and again through that legendary quad-down sequence.
Really starting to appreciate how many manufacturers were putting out the best of what they have to offer in this highly competitive year. I like to think that it’s a conscious effort in the relationships between companies and parks, to push the boundaries and outdo each other in any given time frame. It probably never actually lines up like that, what with how vastly different the time scales are over which these rides are designed and created. I guess it is just business at the end of the day. Anyway, there’s nothing I love more from Intamin than their Wing coaster design, the way those outside seats try to eject you in all sorts of never-before-seen ways after the insanely fast lift hill mercilessly wrenches you up to your doom. They’ve only made two and they’re both top ten rides for me, the biggest success rate in my coasting career. More please.
I’m so desperate to go back and ride this thing, if only in attempt to get some better photos. With all the crazy elements on display above us, an unremarkable lift structure does nothing to sell how this is my favourite wooden coaster on the planet. Yet it’s probably not something any visual can do justice. What makes a ride like this so special is all the things you can’t see that deliver the moments you can’t expect. Hidden intricacies in the building material, the shaping of the transitions and the absolutely inspired use of terrain bring out not only the best of GCI, but the best of roller-coasting in general for me.
Surely that’s the end, right? Amazingly, no. I’ve still got my sights set on a couple of major coasters from 2016, though do have my doubts over whether all but one of them can make a dent in this lineup, based on previous experience.
Mako certainly looks the part, even if it may not be the style of ride I enjoy the most. I’m still waiting for a B&M hyper to blow me away and there’s every chance it could happen one day. Monster appears to be a beast of a Gerstlauer Infinity coaster with a fun selection of elements, perhaps more crucially it would bring me tantalisingly close to completing the worldwide set, again. Storm Chaser is the real, conventional threat to the list. At the risk of setting myself up for disappointment, I don’t see why it wouldn’t give RMC an eye-watering fourth entry here. Valravn on the other hand is the most token of B&M entries to this ‘what else could be good?’ section. I’m sure it’s highly competent, but will it even stand out amongst the coasters at the legendary Cedar Point, let alone the best year ever?
I also feel strangely compelled to give a few honourable mentions this year, mainly to excuse the absence of my favourite Gravity Group from the list. I love Timber to pieces, but the baby woodie just can’t compete here today. They also built twocloned designs in Fantawild parks in China this year, one of which was my best coaster of 2013 and the other a solid finisher in 2015. No mean feat. Lost Gravity was also an outstanding addition to the Mack Rides roster, as the debut of their Big Dipper model. I can’t wait to see more of them.
Whilst my personal selection from 2014 was a little lacking (compared to the overall quality of this decade at least) 2015 is looking to be absolutely stacked. Everything in this list today is, at the very least, incredible. What a year for the coaster industry this one turned out to be!
#10 Acrobat – Nagashima Spa Land (Japan)
Much as I’ve enjoyed the B&M wing coasters that have been popping up over the last few years, for me the company’s Flying Coaster type is a cut above the rest. They generally have far more to offer in terms of extremities and often have elements that would put any seasoned rider out of their comfort zone. Acrobat is admittedly a bit of a lazy clone of Florida’s Manta, complete with matching trains that don’t tie in with the loose theme, but I can’t fault the insanely intense ride experience.
#9 Harpy – Xishuangbanna Sunac Land (China)
So why not have two in a row? I still can’t quite believe how good this ride is. A combination of a fear of clones and a fear of spoilers almost got the better of me and had me originally dismissing Harpy as not worth the effort. In the end it more than paid off the extra lengths you generally have to go to get to this remote Chinese park, by virtue of it’s top tier flyer layout packed with a wicked range of sensations.
#8 Junker – PowerPark (Finland)
Another manufacturer honing their skills and bringing their best coaster model closer to perfection this year was Gerstlauer. Junker is a quintessential Infinity Coaster with a punchy launch, tight manouevres in those tiny trains, powerful airtime and creative inversions. There’s not a dull moment to be found on board.
2015 was the birth of the Jungle Trailblazers, a collection of Gravity Group woodies that opened as the headline attractions of various Fantawild parks throughout China. The fact that so many of them share the same name does them a disservice, as they make use of several different layouts that are all world class in their own right, yet tend to be rather overlooked from an outsiders perspective due to a lack of individual identity. This particular version is notable for having a rare wooden coaster inversion and, to me, for having an insane run of airtime pops all in a row.
#6 Fury 325 – Carowinds (USA)
A busy year for B&M, who also put out their largest creation to date. The beast that is Fury 325 remains the tallest coaster with a traditional lift hill and marked a drastic shift in style for their model of hyper coaster. Rather than largely focusing on those signature camelback hills, Fury performs a very inspired set of manouevres at high speed as it winds its way out across the entrance plaza, into the car park and beyond. It’s a visual spectacle that’s wonderfully presented, as well as a very standout and special ride experience.
#5 Schwur des Kärnan – Hansa Park (Germany)
Gerstlauer also had their sights on something big for 2015. Previous local customer Hansa Park had some lofty ambitions to put a vertical lift hill that reaches over 200ft tall inside a building styled like a medieval tower in Helsingborg, Sweden. Things go on in this tower that had not been seen on a coaster ever before and then once you burst out into the open air at over 80Mph, it’s a ridiculous and intense hyper coaster experience, again like no other. How are we only at number 5?
Well partly because there’s still more Jungle Trailblazers to come. This Wuhu version is the only layout that currently cannot be found anywhere else and also features one of those unnatural inversions. It also plays on some similar beats to China’s very first wooden coaster, with an epic combination of larger and smaller airtime hills that the Gravity Group pull off so well.
#3 Wicked Cyclone – Six Flags New England (USA)
RMC were solidifying themselves amongst the best of the best by now, putting up smash hit after smash hit. The fact that this conversion from an out-of-date wooden coaster into a vicious, storm chasing, world beating experience filled with the perfect blend of extreme airtime and glorious inversions has become bread and butter to the manufacturer by now is simply scary.
#2 Twisted Colossus – Six Flags Magic Mountain (USA)
So give them the opportunity to reimagine an iconic and massive racing woodie at another park on the other side of the country and then be astounded by the result. I’ve written at length about how this is my favourite RMC to date on here and it’s a personal top 5 in the world. Yet we’re still not done here for this year.
My favourite Gravity Group creation trumps my favourite RMC for now, by the tiniest of margins up at the top of course. Something about the raw-er experience of an actual wooden coaster at the absolute best it can be, along with the unpredictability that can bring just appeals to me slightly more and this third Jungle Trailblazer was such an incredible shock to the system upon a first ride for countless reasons. I had no idea they could be this good.
Well with a list so packed full of superlatives can there really be anything else left in the world to threaten this bunch? Amazingly, yes. Cannibal appears to be the US equivalent of Kärnan with it’s intimidating tower structure and unorthodox design, the fact that it’s even more ‘homegrown’ in execution fascinates me. Impulse is a rare example of a Zierer Tower coaster, another string I need to add to my bow at some point to at least see how they compare with other, similar designs. On top of all their other achievements this year, B&M also went wild with a launched version of their Wing coaster by the name of Thunderbird. Something else I’ve definitely got to check out at some point.
