I was a tad apprehensive about revisiting this one, for a myriad of reasons, but mainly that the original visit went so well, all things considered. You hear the stories about how legendary but brutal the coasters are, and how equally diabolical the operations can be. We smashed all the creds, enjoyed all of the big 4 and big Eej was an instant top 10. The only thing that went wrong was not seeing Mt. Fuji.
+1 to be had though, they have #1 Zokkon now, looking all Fury 325 at the entrance but not impressive. Headed here at rope drop to knock it on the head.
Despite being close to the second person into the queue, it took about 30 minutes before I headed out the exit of the ride, in another typical snowballing of faff.
There’s lockers, security scanners, all that fun stuff, then you get batched into a preshow room.
This isn’t a fun preshow in any sense of the word though, and set up a bit of a concerning theme for the day and the park’s future as a whole.
It’s literally just a spoiler-packed instructional safety video of how to ride a rollercoaster, with footage and diagrams of the whole experience. Sit in this specific position, hold onto this bar properly, look into the corners because there might be forces etc.
There’s two tunnel sections here, there’s a launch here, there’s a transfer track here, it goes backwards here. Be warned, be prepared, brace your ass.
I just found this process to be such a buzzkill. It’s extremely clear that the nature of Dodonpa’s (RIP) demise has scared the pants off of the park and they’re just doing everything in their power to not have to take down another $50M worth of steel over a complaint letter campaign. And Zokkon as a product just plain sucks as a result.
‘Lucked out’ on a front row and was thoroughly bored by the experience. It’s such an odd coaster design that makes no sense, seems to appeal to no one in particular and, at a guess, was heavily modified from potential previous concepts for the above reasons.
The launches don’t do a whole lot, the layout doesn’t do a whole lot. Then it goes backwards which doesn’t make sense on motorbikes. Then it does a Hagrid and backs into a shed, but instead of dropping it just sits around, then slowly rolls forwards again to audible yawns.
Just about the only redeeming feature about it is the onboard soundtrack, which plays a happy-go-lucky theme tune, painting a picture of yay, fun, future, motybikes. Very Japanese in that regard.
Trim it down boys.
Sad times. RIP.
Hoping for a pick me up, I headed straight to Eejanaika, my favourite coaster in Japan. Had about a 50 minute queue, not too bad.
They’ve seriously jacked up both their English announcements and safety announcements in the queuelines here. About the only words I understood on park last time were the ‘attention guests, Eejanaika is now open’ announcements, following intermittent rain, followed by the running of the bulls.
These days it’s a constant barrage of DO NOT RIDE THIS RIDE IF THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH YOU. Heart problems? Skip it. Headache? Skip it. Hangnail? Skip it.
Also noticed on all the physical boards now that they’ve lowered the age limit on their attractions to a low, low 54 years old. That’s an ouch for the previous generation of coaster fans.
So all in all, more buzzkill that doesn’t really hype up the most intense coaster in the world in any positive manner. Just about the only redeeming feature about it is that they still play the themed Eejanaika chant with tin tapping audio.
Up in the station, after you’ve de-shoed and lockered up, you enter the same batching process but with an added instructional pep talk including school classroom signage and pointy stick.
Sit in this specific position, hold onto this bar properly, look into the corners because there aren’t any. Ok maybe 1.
What they don’t explain well is how the restraint system works, which I’ve never understood, but staff are always there to help out. It has been ‘enhanced’ since my previous attempt with several more seatbelts, much chonkier ‘padding’ around the shoulders and head making it more like an SLC and some sort of strap to stop you legendarily legging over the seat hump on the final element. The staff went through a process of additional restraint checks, verbal verification and a mutual thumbs up with each rider no less than three times, every time.
I didn’t think much of it however, as this was all happening, I felt like I knew the score. Excited and nervous, these particular contraptions still get to me in a way that little else does any more. Amazing despatch, unnervingly tilting you onto your back out of the station, terrifying lift hill, business as usual.
Then it Shambalaed at the top of the lift and slowed itself right down. Huh. That’s new.
It’s gone.
It is with great sadness and regret that I must report that I no longer like Eejanaika. Rather than something to be scoffed at, all of the safety instructions and warnings here became entirely justified, while also meaningless because you can’t really do anything about it. It’s gotten rough as balls and I hated every second of it, from the moment it first shook my brain, to the moment the new ‘safety features’ cut my leg open when hitting the brakes, to stop me legging over the seat hump. I wouldn’t recommend the experience to anyone.
I’ve always struggled to describe what exactly it is I like(d) about the 4D coasters. They’re so unconventional in forces applied when compared to any other major coaster we like to review. Great airtime there, nope. Great laterals there, nope. Great hangtime, nope. What does it actually do to you that’s measureably good? Not knowing that and simply embracing the chaos in a petrified yet elated manner was just the whole deal, start to finish. It was an unrefined, raw type of thrill and love.
Now there’s just as much doubt in my mind as there was when I first rode one. Did I get too used to it? Who changed more, me or the ride? No, it’s the children who are wrong.
On the upside, I got confirmation that I still care far too much about this stupid hobby as I very nearly shed a tear for Eejainaika on the exit ramp, once the reality of the situation hit me. Even while writing about it now, there’s a tremble in my hands. Sometimes these are more than rollercoasters to us, they’re characters, and our time spent with them is precious. And they’ve killed this one.
RIP.
But don’t worry, you can still do VR Dodonpa with a fan in your face. For the Eejanaika one, the staff now club you with baseball bats.
Back to business, had to go try out the flying theatre. It’s currently running two different layovers a day, the traditional Fuji Airways in the morning and Attack on Titan in the evening. Thus the queue doesn’t know what it wants to be.
Fuji Airways was about as boring as Zokkon, I just don’t vibe with wafting over poorly animated scenery, alongside animated NPCs flying in Gerstlauer Skyfly cars, which was very jarring, especially having done attractions just like it 50 times over.
We’ll be back again for it later.
I then caught myself in a weird trance, willingly walking into the back of a 70 minute queue for Takabisha. Gotta tick it off for the day, right?
As I stood still for about 30 seconds the question just hit me, ‘why?’ So I left again.
In fact I left completely, headed out of the park, via these.
Look at these bad boys.
Didn’t know that one was a thing, but it just made the time travel bucket list.
RIP
It was both sobering and freeing to take some time out from the park that usually causes so much stress to the first time visitor. Had some lunch and went for a little drive to settle a little 7-year vendetta.
Fuji-san was finally out, as famous for spiting people as any good Fuji-Q coaster. Not quite the postcard picture being August, but still a majestic old thing. Tick.
Fuji-Q Highland
Went back later in the afternoon, revitalised, to dust off the rest of the park. Oh, did I mention it was too hot yet?
Thomas’ Party Parade has become Thomas’ Treasure Hunt.
To fit this new theme, it now has flashlights like Disney’s Monsters Inc. ride. S’alright.
This was new.
And this Naruto X Boruto Ninja Voltage 3D Shooting Ride was cheap and lazy, not a fan.
RIP
Went back to the flying theatre for the other showing, Attack on Titan THE RIDE, and it was a significant improvement. To start, the same batching staff was now putting on an act and scaring the crowd in the build up to the preshow.
Know very little of the franchise, other than big blokes, and it ruining Space Fantasy: The Ride for us many years ago. Very different from the usual experience with this hardware, focusing more on just a single, storytelling scene with much more limited ‘soaring’ but much more violent reactions to what was happening.
Some big blokes beat up some other big blokes, notably quite graphic and with some swearing. Rather cool, and very Japanese once again.
Park started to clear out as the evening wore on, so got onto Fujiyama with about a two train wait, which is incredible in itself.
The sky didn’t look like this though,
It looked more like this, but good. And god damn.
Eejanaika’s loss is Fujiyama’s gain as I absolutely adored it. It’s the perfect Togo, stupidly huge but with comfy seats and lap bars, poorly designed but with insane and intense forces.
It was a scene to be painted, with a crescendo of magical moments. Heading up the stupidly massive lift hill in the dusk, sunset behind a Fuji I could actually see. Ride begins, it’s big and it’s fast but it doesn’t do a whole lot.
The flat turnaround at the other side now goes around the weird giant observation deck they built within the ride, which I always imagined to be a dumb idea, but it’s glorious. There’s people up there, waving to the train as you go round and that was equal parts surreal and endearing.
The ride builds. More drops, more speed, more slow corners, gradually amping up those forces. In the final third it reaches the point at which Togo clearly didn’t know what to do. We went 260ft up to break a record here and now we’re carrying so much speed, in a specified plot of land that doesn’t have the room to deal with such speed, so…
Bam, super intense, ground level 90° banked hairpin. Off-axis airtime hills but they’re not, they’re off-banked and super janked and what the hell is happening it’s horrifying and hilarious and so, so out of control. How is this 30 years old, how has it not torn itself to shreds over that time like Eejanaika? I hit the brakes absolutely buzzing with joy, slapping the restraint and laughing my arse off.
It’s such a wild and intense finale and the perfect summation of what Fuji-Q represents, or at least what it used to. You can’t experience any of what I’ve just described anywhere else. It’s a legend of the industry. There’s never been another one like it and there never will be.
They used to have 4 legends here, and very little else. Collectively these were always their global draw, and ticking them off always felt like an impossibly daunting experience, where any one of them could be your new favourite, but any one of them could also kill you. You could obsessively cycle through them in your head for days, months or years before a visit. What’s the rank order of priority if I can’t ride them all? What’s the most efficient way to ride them all? What if it rains and they all go home?
Now one’s been removed for safety, one probably should be removed for safety and one’s a clone. When the park announced their largest investment ever, it should have been lifechanging. Instead we got Zokkon, which now simply exists to suggest they’re too scared to build anything adventurous any more.
There’s 1 legend left and it’s stood the longest. Fujiyama, the King of Coasters.
Oh yeah, the clone. Figured I may as well complete the set now that the queue had died down for Takabisha, which it had, but nowhere near as much, depressingly.
Should have left it alone, it’s also rough as balls now, bottom of Saw’s first drop rough in every valley and juddering headaches through the rest of the inversions. Used to be ‘decent fun for a Eurofighter, shame about the restraints’. Now it’s ‘kill it with fire’. And in an American mall, not operating. Paultons, 2026.
So those were some ups and downs to end the day with. I could have walked back onto Fujiyama several times but I felt it wasn’t worth the risk to it’s reputation and that there was a lesson to be learned here. A cred is only as good as the last time you rode it, so try and walk away with that W.
As for the park, a sorry state of affairs really, made me sad. Dodonpa has left a huge hole physically, in their lineup and in their future as a coaster destination of the world. While it was nice to have a much more relaxed visit, I feel like the jeopardy and adventure of making it onto that big 4 is what made the place special. The golden era has passed and now it’s just a bad collection of rides with a special Togo.
Picked a car up the following morning in order to, sort of, escape Tokyo. Didn’t have massively solid plans for the day, just a sprinkling of potential +1s here and there, and the main focus ended up being to simply not die from heat exhaustion.
First establishment was down on a little southern peninsula, about an hours drive out. Noticed it pop up on coast2coaster and that it had no photos, so for the good of the community…
Day 6 – Nagai Uminote Park Soleil Hill
The place is free to enter and has a range of other activities. Main focus seems to be on general wellbeing, seeing some animals, touching some grass, playing in some water, a nice escape from the mad metropolis.
Tucked away in one corner is a small amusement section that I assume has been around a while, with some views out over the sea.
But the coaster is brand new so, you’re welcome. Picked up a couple of ride tickets from an automated machine under the ferris wheel and hopped on.
After becoming the most popular animal on the internet, it seems they jumped on the bandwagon here in creating #1 Capybara Coaster, a change from the old faithful dragons we’ve come to know and love.
Interestingly the front car was closed off and, from the second car, you could see through the shell of the footwell and into the ‘engine’/cogs/power system for the train inside it’s brain, so I guess the custom moulding didn’t go exactly to plan.
Elsewhere they have a very chill petting zoo, where you can meet the real deal and get kicked by a kangaroo. Too hot for that thankfully.
And this lot.
Nice place, grabbed an ice cream and headed out.
I remembered the next park was a bit of a pain to get to by train before, so also had it on the ‘with car’ hitlist.
Yomiuriland
Downside is that you don’t get to ride the cablecar across the park if you enter via the car park, but been there and done that, wanted to just be in and out as efficiently as possible for the sake of self preservation.
Hit the record for the trip on the drive to the park at an eye watering 41°C. This had me worried at the entrance to the park as it seemed the gates were closed, with a large crowd stuck outside them. Have they (sensibly) deemed it too hot to theme park?
Asked for clarification at the ticket desk and it turns out I’d just rocked up seconds before 3pm, at which point they had a cheap afternoon deal on, so everyone was just being held back for that. Sweet, I’ll take one of those please.
Thus one of my favourite parks in Japan was offensively under-priced.
Once inside, headed straight to what I knew as the new cred, #2 Lipovitan Rocket☆Luna, the weird Gerstlauer family suspended thing that very much suits this place. Had about a 30 minute wait (as advertised), but in a beautifully air-conned building, so all good.
Queueline has a bit of storyline setup, but most of it went over my head. Bad robots show up and pink power ranger shouts for help to blue power ranger, so loud that it carries through space.
The coaster itself is partially interactive, as you’re encouraged to scream or clap at certain key moments and then your train gets given a score on the final brakes. This is mainly on audio cue as the show building doesn’t really contain much of anything visually striking. You just sort of waft around some disco lights and sounds in a rather awkward layout that seems to not know what to do with itself. Kinda like the fashion themed spinning coaster across the way.
I had forgotten the details of the installation and was hoping for a launched lift or something to spice things up a bit, but there’s just two chain lifts, the second leading to the little outdoor fly by and then ending a tad slow as the station is elevated.
S’alright.
The actual newest coaster, though we use the term loosely here, was #3 Dino Runner. It’s a weird little powered contraption that barely, barely seems to be affected by gravity.
Trains are fun, as you can be seated on carnivores, herbivores or in a 3-adult-wide mine cart, all of which rhythmically rock back and forth during the layout.
It goes round a volcano, bit of smoke, bit of a water effect at the end, so all tarted up rather nicely. Just a complete non-event in terms of hardware. Good for a little cooldown.
You know what else is good for a cooldown. Wet Bandit.
This ride, specifically the summer upgrade that gets you wet, was life-changing on my first visit. On a day that had been riddled with rain-related spite, because ‘tracks were wet’, this 250ft monstrosity of a jet coaster was actively soaking everyone and itself by means of geysers, ridiculously powerful water jets hidden in forests and general summer party vibes.
It still delivered all of that on this occasion, though this time themed to anime babies and it’s remained an insane coaster to experience. The layout is just so weird, but weirdly good, starting out with the epic views from the top and a huge drop into some intense corners.
The highlights though are heading out into valleys and plains that feel miles from the station at that point, a true terrain coaster. The second half is interspersed with surprisingly good airtime hills, considering the restraints, age of it etc. These old Togos really are something special.
They were running it super efficiently for Japan too, two trains and all. Also upgraded the loose item system from ‘here’s a weird canvas sack for your stuff, stick that under your feet’ to free lockers. Ok, maybe that’s more boring and less quirky, but an upgrade to most.
Headed out just as an epic thunderstorm rolled in and evacuated the extremely sweaty water park, so that was good timing which then provided a very atmospheric drive out into the mountains. Pleased with the flying visit overall. +2 and some love to a legend of the industry. Great park.
The following morning we flew to Tokyo, with the only real highlight being that the aircraft safety video contained Pokémon.
Train to the hotel was giving lovely weather reports on the screens, implying that the whole upcoming week was completely cooked. It included a safety rating system, of which we were on the highest (or lowest) as the heat was deemed a significant risk to human life. Can’t escape it.
Didn’t have much planned for the day, so wisely spent most of it in air-conned malls and trains, seeing some sights and doing some shopping.
In the evening however, I did have tickets booked for
Day 5 – Tokyo Disneysea
All business here. They had 3 new dark rides and we had 4 hours in which to do them, thanks to the fact that they now offer cheap entry after 5pm. Seemed like a fun idea and a good challenge. Wasn’t a huge fan of the Tokyo resort before, not least for their handling of other weather related incidents. But also a general soullessness, lacklustre versions of rides, busyness and overhyping.
Wasn’t overly pleased to learn that they now offer paid one-shot fast track on every major attraction and it absolutely tanks throughput for everyone else.
Powered straight through the park and into the new Disney Springs land then, past the iconic volcano in scaffolding and a closed Indiana Jones. Indy was in fact the main motivator behind choosing this particular day to visit. It was down for a long scheduled maintenance starting the following day, but had broken down today anyway, so that was another meaningless decision among many.
Mercifully all of the restricted entry rubbish that this place once had is now over and done with. Mental maths dictated that Peter Pan’s Never Land Adventure was to be up first.
Pre-show happened on these screens, introduced to the lost boys. Kid with the glasses needs saving from Captain Hook. Nothing new here.
Boarded the cool boat looking things and flew off around various stuff.
It’s an odd one, a 4D motion-based dark ride that marks a closer Disney attempt at a Spiderman/Transformers equivalent (not their own Spiderman, which might be their worst thing ever). The motions themselves are much less violent, inevitably, and thus it spends a lot of the time acting like a mini flying theatre in front of a sequence of screens. Great for an Asian audience in that regard, they love a flying theatre.
This is all well and good, just a little underwhelming amongst their later streak of attractions. The most effective parts for me were some interesting visual transitions into and out of the screens, to and from physical scenery. There’s about 15% of the Shanghai Pirates effect in there, in that it feels magical and disorienting but then the media was just quite boring and easy for me to check out on.
I just don’t know why it’s Peter Pan at this point. They have his ride over in the other park. There’s no new story, just repeating the same old classics. Walk the plank, crocodile, you can fly, you can fly, Big Ben. End. Oh and it has glasses, which I had completely forgotten that until writing this, so they added nothing.
My most hopeful theory is that this is a testing ground for a much more violent and impressive version of the hardware that is yet to come. Maybe we can feel like we’ve had a few rounds with Thanos on it.
Alternatively people will just eat up anything in these parks at this point, so there’s no need to care.
Moving swiftly on, Anna and Elsa’s Frozen Journey had the biggest queue of course. The queue was extended out beyond the entrance and had staff members with signs to highlight >>>this is the back of the queue<<<, all that fun stuff.
Though I don’t consider myself to be the biggest of Frozen fans, it is from right about my peak era of consuming that type of media, enough to have seen it more than once and know and enjoy a number of the songs anyway.
As such there was a bit of a special moment for me shortly after joining the back of the queue and taking in the admittedly impressive surroundings, as the intro song from the first film hit in the background. Disney magic still exists, in places. Tastefully they continued to play instrumental versions of other tunes throughout the area and as we, eventually, headed indoors.
Queue contains an interesting collection of stuff, set mostly within the castle when they were kids. Then you get on some boats. Then god damn.
I’ve always been spoiler averse, but additionally in my business-like mode of making decisions to visit theme parks currently – well they’ve got something new, guess I’ll go ride it – this attraction just wasn’t on my radar of things to get excited about. I’m not sure anything actively is these days.
Which can be a blessing when something comes and blows you away. This attraction hit for me on every level. Not only on visuals, songs, nostalgia, but the more geeky technical stuff of dark ride systems like the precision timing of specific show sequences, with boats.
It’s got wow moments, it’s got scary moments, it’s got aww moments and it’s everything the shoehorned Epcot version wasn’t. Loved it. I’ve got no specific data to back it up, but in my head it’s ‘top 5 Disney ride, that.’
With hours on the clock fading fast, there was just Rapunzel’s Lantern Festival left to do.
This is also of that era for me, so had a modicum of expectation to live up to, even though I knew it was supposedly the lesser of the attractions here.
It starts outside, drifting past a massive version of the tower with Rapunzel singing from all the way up the top. Sense of scale here is pretty impressive for a ‘dark ride’, even more for an outdoor portion of one, however that may work.
Then you go inside and get a lovely rendition of I See the Light, surrounded by all the lanterns and stuff. Then it ends.
Cute and all, but diabolically short. Glad the queue had reduced to almost nothing for the night and anyone who fast-tracks it for the same price as other rides should probably feel ripped off.
Mission complete and basically everything in the park was closed at this point.
Except Sindbad’s Storybook Voyage. The unloved ride of the park. Well I love it at least, it’s very much my thing. Goes on literally forever in comparison to what we had just ridden, while he contently sings variations on the same tune, in a happy tone, about all his crazy adventures.
It’s also just much more visually impressive than it gets credit for I feel. This ain’t no small world. Great ride, second best of the night.
And that was Disneysea. I do kinda vibe with the evening ticket idea, works well with the city location and is very good value for money. When Florida is trying to charge me £1100 a head to go back and force me to stay for a minimum of 2 weeks, popping out of Tokyo for £20 and getting some quality dark rides in is perfect for the seasoned visitor that doesn’t need to spend 15 years planning every second of their 15 hour day on park, hating both life and their bank account. Just wish the queues were better.
The main event on Hokkaido is Rusutsu Resort, which we arrived at the following morning after navigating this mountain.
Day 4 – Rusutsu Resort
I had specifically saved this visit for a weekend day, in what the park themselves designated as peak season, in the hopes of minimal spite, so it was time to see if that worked out. Interestingly they charge you for the car park on a peak day, but not off-peak.
The entrance is like a hotel lobby, weirdly, and contains this tree near the ticket desk.
Bit of a European vibe all round in the indoor bit.
Which then leads outside to a long walk up a big hill. Very pretty though.
I was, semi-tactically heading to the top of the hill first, past this area which was unfortunately all closed. Think that might have been the last in the set of first generation Intamin drop towers for me.
What wasn’t closed, and hidden round the corner in some trees, was the reason I came.
Yes, it’s the legendary #1 Ultra Twister with the dive loop instead of the mid-course reversal. Beautiful.
What I had never considered in knowing about this one is how it does take care of the direction change. Immediately after leaving the station there’s a little turntable that spins you round and backs you out in preparation for the vertical lift. It’s so over-complicated and unnerving and ahead of its time and it makes me happy.
I also don’t remember, or it’s more exaggerated here, but the restraint system is terrifying in itself. The shoulder part is super wide, so a more narrow human, such as their target audience, could easily just turn a bit and slip out if they so wished. Then there’s a ‘lap’ bar which is barely the width of one leg, so made no contact with my legs at all and, again, you could just sort of straddle yourself past it if you so wished.
Anyway, this made it all the more exciting with the layout, which starts with two moments of legitimate, scary airtime. Then the entry to the famed dive loop is super sustained, providing hangtime into the restraint that barely functions.
Then, because there’s no braking in this configuration, it absolutely flies through the heartline rolls at the end, which is super intense and a little painful on the shoulders as it hurls you around. Worth it though.
Got my fill of this fabulous thing before moving on, suddenly feeling a bit emotional about it as the reality hit me that any lap on one of these could be the very last, particularly with this being the only unique layout. My namesake rides don’t feel long for this world, with another slated for removal and this one tucked away up in the trees at the back of the park with almost zero footfall. Sad.
Moving further down the hill we hit this Jungle Mouse type thing in #2 Go Go Sneaker.
Was alright, single file seating for that extra poke and reasonably efficiently operated.
Then off to the right was the park’s signature Jet Coaster in #3 Mountain Jet Coaster.
Bit smaller than Hokkaido Greenland’s finest and back to the more usual affair of having a lack of any real forces, which is fine. Lovely views.
Not sure what this was from, old trains of a still existing coaster here.
This coaster is gone though.
Down in the back corner is another terrific Togo. Standard #4 Standing Coaster with the one loop, the only one left now since Yomiuriland got rid of theirs. Sad.
Still the best standups in the genre for actually standing you up, and instilling the fear of that into you. I should probably reserve judgment on that until I try the new B&M version I guess, but it’s B&M so I’m confident in the statement.
Park has a serious issue with guest flow it seems. All of these rides that are slightly out of the way were getting no guests at all.
And then I queued over an hour for this stupid #5 Loop the Loop, which is bang in the middle of the park, on the main path. One of the infinite reasons it took so long is that they weren’t filling all the rows for some reason. Maybe speed / heat?
First time I’ve managed to do one of this model at least, the Meisho reverse shuttle loop. Was quite forceful even without the full train, but rode pretty poorly for a straight line. A step below the Togos for sure.
The other ride bang in the middle of the park, on the main path, directly opposite, was the Vekoma SLC. This was originally slated as down for maintenance, which I was happy about, but then it opened, to my dismay. Regardless, the queue was pure unshaded misery, non-moving with 7-10 minute train dispatches and I’m overdue on moaning about how hot it was again, so I didn’t want to be dealing with that.
Instead walked straight into the train of the Arrow #6 Corkscrew directly behind it. There’s such a serious bottleneck in this park, and it’s nothing to do with the quality of the rides, just physical location, sightlines and guests being sheep.
The ride was absolute trash and gave me a disgusting headache. I’ve already said it once in the past few months, but I’ll say it again. Some old coasters should be treasured and saved, we’ve just seen a handful of them. These should not. These aren’t it.
So to clear that, we jumped on the cable car which you can add as an extra to your park ticket for a few quid.
It takes you up the mountain to look at the other mountain.
And a lake.
Headache cleared.
I had a different kind of headache brewing though, driven purely by my unhealthy obsessions. Hokkaido Greenland. Didn’t finish it. Last day in Hokkaido. We can still make it.
The sacrifice to be made here was skipping the hour+ queue and heatstroke for the SLC in order to revisit the other park, thus not finishing this park. So it was all a bit daft, but an easy decision to make.
So that was Rusutsu. Beautiful place, great value, very chill. Worth it for Ultra Twister and some other rare oddities, but needs a dark ride and, like all these Japanese parks these days, something actually new and good. Hit the shuttle loop and SLC first seems to be the best play if you come, and care.
The other advantage of leaving early was the opportunity to drive round this lake.
Hokkaido Greenland, again
Same drill as before, rocked up with just enough time for the parking attendant to be concerned, and then let us in for free.
Knew exactly what I was doing with entry and ride tickets this time though.
Started out on the other kiddie cred, Torokko Coaster. Would have been set complete for the only known Takahashi Kikai Sangyo coaster in the world, but disaster struck.
It rounded the corner and hit the lift hill, then at the literal second I was contemplating and remarking about how the lift was a conveyor belt, it broke. E-stopped dead.
The operator came running over, shouting, and immediately pulled a piece of said conveyor belt from straight underneath us and the train. It was gone.
He then whipped a ladder out and row by row we evacuated through the ride area, climbing over the track in the process. Quite the experience, but not the one I came for.
Severely spited, headed up the hill to the last cred, #7 Dragon King. Another horrible corkscrew coaster but this time a local one from Senyo.
It was also awful, in a different way. No headaches, but a nasty self tightening restraint that just got worse and worse as the course and forces went on, to the point that I was extremely pinned and uncomfortable by the final brakes, in a half-panicked claustrophobic kinda way. Not good.
The Great Haunted House might have my new favourite façade, but it delivered nothing on what it promised.
Just an underwhelming ghost train in a hot box.
Obviously the broken coaster wasn’t back, though I checked their website for a laugh where they had it listed as ‘closed for special circumstances.’ Nice.
So that was that for the day. In the end I traded 1 awful coaster for another awful coaster, and failed to complete both parks, with an extra few hours driving on top. But at least the trade was locally built. We’ve got Vekoma at home.
Got what I came for though, Ultra Twister, Crazy Mouse and GO-ON are the real deal. And seals. That’s it from Hokkaido, off to the mainland.
The following morning began with an offensively cheap McDonalds breakfast. I’ve lovingly criticised Japan in the past for being expensive to visit, but since that time the value of their currency has essentially halved relative to our own. So now the things that were a bit much (trains, parks, goods) are now decently priced, and things that were already decent (hotels, fuel, foods) now feel unfair, to the point that a Mackmuffin, apple pie and upcharge premium coffee now total under £2. It’s also fast, and food, unlike in the UK.
Anyway, enough food nonsense, the reason we were here in Kitami was
Day 3 – Kitami Family Land
Where?
Well the place just happens to be home to this delicious looking contraption from Togo. You know, like the one at Knotts that was a bit of a saga.
As such, I fully expected death, but the golden rule of Togo in Japan is that they’re actually good. And I liked #1 Crazy Mouse, a lot.
In a world full of boring wild mice coasters, this just has everything going for it. The loop itself is pretty intense and the rest of the unconventional layout has a decent mix of forces, decent length and rode surprisingly well. It’s also right next to a little petting zoo so got a surprise goat jump scare about half way round, which was a bonus.
There’s even a little airtime finale which actually lands. Loved it. It was pay per ride, but I paid again. Gotta support your local parks this year.
One other cred in the park, the cold steel of a powered #2 Dragon Coaster.
This happy fellow to be specific, glorious.
Nice little place overall, out in the middle of nowhere with not much to do. Was surprisingly busy though, despite those factors, which was great to see. So glad to have bagged the Crazy Mouse, a coaster to be cherished.
That was the only planned park of the day, though there is another up in the north of the island. Having researched their website, I found no trace or mention of the coaster that they have/had so I had kinda written it off.
However the place we were planning to drive to next took us right past it anyway, so popped in just to confirm.
Family Ailand You
Always a ferris wheel.
The powered #3 Dragon most certainly is still here, thus retaining the title of Japan’s most northerly coaster, so this was a bit of a bonus cred. Glorious.
Nice place, but the sea smells weird here.
Up the road was a seal sanctuary, by far one of my favourite animals, so couldn’t resist a visit.
The area is also famous for sea ice in the winter, when you can take boat trips out to carve it all up.
No ice in August though, just chillin’.
Feeding time was fun.
Something else you can do in Japan, if you don’t like collecting coasters, is drive around the country collecting Pokémon lids. There’s a map and database for them and everything. Here’s an appropriate one for the location.
Still had a long way to go from here, so found another interesting looking stopping point on route.
A closed for the day ferris wheel.
This area is meant to be famous for its lavender fields but again, August.
Though we did manage to have some lavender ice cream. Ending it on food again.
Off to Japan then. The main inspiration within the inspiration and draw for the region this time around was the northern island of Hokkaido. Somewhere I’d never been and home to that certain special coaster, among others.
So flew direct to Sapporo from Shanghai, budget airline, nice and cheap. Was due to land late morning and drive over to the first park for early afternoon, but to this day I don’t really know what happened. There were no significant delays involved but every little step along the way just snowballed with minor time hemorrhages. From the flight, to immigration, to customs, to lunch, to the car hire shuttle bus, to the car hire, to my prepaid eSim not working, to the car sat nav being a poor alternative…
Though I had anticipated approximately 3 hours to play with, including all travel faff, we actually ended up with just 45 minutes on park. Not good.
Day 2 – Hokkaido Greenland
To start things off, the parking attendant wanted to make extremely sure we were aware of this fact, at least 3 times over and in many different forms of communication – we’re closing soon. Understood. As a cheeky bonus this led to being waved in without paying for the car park, so that was nice.
Then a slight panic at the entrance because it was obviously too late to all in on a ride pass. Pretty much every regional park out here offers entrance, pay per ride and wristband separately, to suit everyone’s needs.
The panic was of course getting entry only, and then not really knowing what the queues were, where the rides were, what to hit up, what ride tickets to buy, where to buy said ride tickets. I could physically feel the clock ticking as we stepped inside.
Started out on this little crocodile fronted #1 Wani Wani Coaster anyway, as it was in sightline, so pretty strong.
Then the actual priority for this park was the big jet coaster, in case we never made it back, though I was already furiously calculating how to in the back of my mind.
The day was lost here as it had a pretty significant queue, taking around half an hour or so before landing in the last train of the day. Bit of a shame they closed at 5pm sharp in the height of summer, while seemingly rather busy for what I know of these parks, but still better than Alton Towers.
Anyway #2 GO-ON was glorious. I’m a sucker for just chilling on this ride type, but it actually had some strong forces to it, while riding very well, for what it is.
The profiling of some of the hills is uncharacteristically sharp and near the back they were popping off rather nicely.
The awkward Arrow-style manual banking and transitions also managed to be a source of entertainment rather than discomfort and it simply goes-on for an absolute age, not least for the multiple minutes on the lift hill. Overall it just hit a magic spot for me in that moment, where you catch yourself amongst the chaos, reflecting on where you are and what you’re doing. Back in Japan at long last, doing what they do best. Love it.
So with 2 coasters down, 2 coasters and a dark ride to go, had to leave at that point, head hung in shame. Park incomplete.
Continued to have internet and navigation issues into the night, which happened to include a multiple hour journey into the depths of the island, but made it to an excellent hotel in one piece and got everything working flawlessly for the rest of the trip, so expect a better showing from here on out.
Hello and welcome back to another edition of complaints about weather and ride availability.
I’ve always loved travelling in Japan, including for creds, so it’s been far too long since my last visit at just over 6 years. There’s something about their average +1s that just aren’t your normal overpriced wacky worm or powered dragon. Ok there’s still a lot of powered dragons. But as a sucker for many of the Japanese ride manufacturers, including my boys at Togo and the simple pleasures of the native Jet Coaster, it’s always been a jolly time.
The main inspiration for this trip was simple FOMO, in that I get the continuing sense of their industry continuing to die, outside of Disney and Universal. I’ll soon be mourning the loss of another of my namesake and there’s one in particular that’s just been on my bucket list for far too long now.
We’ve got to get there first though, with price and routing ending up taking us through Shanghai, which I instantly saw as an opportunity for a 24-hour stint to nab something else that’s been eluding me for what feels like forever.
Day 1
Thus proceedings began on a BA flight that was delayed over an hour after boarding, for having a faulty radar system and then air-con that spat ice over everyone when it was turned on, both of which needed fixing by an engineer. It came very close to a full evacuate the plane and put us on another one situation, which would have sucked immensely no doubt, but thankfully they got it sorted.
It didn’t really matter, was just boring and an opportunity to moan at the British. We landed in China bright and early, took too long to get an on-the-spot Visa, grabbed a SIM card, Didi to the hotel, dropped off bags, Didi to the park, breathe.
When I say bright, it was already 38°C by 08:30, so it was right back into the seemingly inescapable furnace. Oh, what park? This one.
Shanghai Haichang Ocean Park
Though I’ve never graced its gates, I feel like I’ve had this place on at least 5 separate Chinese itineraries. Have always phoned ahead because it’s an ass to get to from actual Shanghai, being like an hours drive south of the airport that’s also a long way out of actual Shanghai. They are extending a metro line down this way though it seems. Anyway we were always, inevitably, being told that Steel Dolphin was closed. So pretty spiteful, just indirectly.
This time however it was all systems go. Asked again on the door for final verification and then headed in, aflame, to witness a launch and then some happy(?) riders pass me by on both sides of this bridge.
However, upon arrival at the entrance, it had been closed off, only slowly eating through the remainder of its sweaty queue. Broke the cardinal rule of asking the entrance staff why, by putting the words in their mouth of ‘too hot?’ ‘Yes, too hot.’ You can come up with any of your own reasons for these situations and they’ll just nod and agree to save coming up with another excuse, regardless of the truth.
The good news was that it was scheduled to reopen again in a few hours, after the ride ‘cooled down’, if we believe it. The weather certainly didn’t.
The bad news was having to stay in the park another few hours.
There is a +1 just opposite, this lumpy Zamperla #1 Family Coaster with a penguin pilot on the front of the train. Took a few cycles but got the job done.
Then headed over to find somewhere or something indoor. Being an ‘ocean park’ it’s quite animal exhibit focused, so this whole building was full of sharks and stuff.
We then got stuck in a miserable counterflow of literally thousands of guests pouring out of a dolphin show or equivalent, while trying to get to a cable car over to another indoor area. Turns out the cable car was upcharge, in a park that cost me more than Disneysea this trip, so that was a defiant no.
Disgusting weather and disgusting crowding was doing no favours to the park and travel exhaustion was quickly catching up to us. With around an hour ’til Steel Dolphin I decided to just camp it for fear that the queue would instantly be ruined again upon opening and make the visit even more lengthy than necessary. I did at some point have grand schemes of knocking this out in an hour and heading over to the new Legoland, but though that’s also ‘in’ Shanghai they couldn’t be further apart, at about 3 hours journey. Next time.
My fears were confirmed as it got quite sweaty in more than one sense of the word, around 30 mins beforehand, with growing guest attention blocking the entire pathway, all jostling for position and awkwardly staring down the ride host. After a poor attempt at crowd control which turned into a bit of an unruly scrum that included queue-jumping, I stood my ground. They eventually caved and opened the queue a bit earlier, the obvious logical option anyway – where could we possibly store all of these people waiting for a ride?
Upon powering through the queue, staff were handing out water balloons to each guest as a bit of fun and source of coolant, one of the few positive touches about the place. Not sure if we were supposed to drop them on the LSMs or something to help the ride out.
The ride also reopened a little early, thankfully, ended up on the second despatch, back row. There’s a bit of a familiar Taron grunt to the first launch, something which no doubt garnered a lot of excitement back in the day for this ride, when such rides were such a hot topic.
It’s a little more unjustified here as #2 Steel Dolphin borders a little more on the family-thrill side. There were a handful of standout moments in the back, a wonky off axis hill, a lurch out of the top hat and another similar one into a tunnel around halfway through. There’s also just a lot of weird pacing and meandering however, seemingly to suit certain ideas they had around the visual presentation of the ride.
Passing along the bridge the first time just has this forceless flat hump, and then much of the cornering soon after is done for the look over the entrance plaza rather than the onboard experience.
The return trip over the bridge contains the second launch and it’s another of my bugbear ones, perhaps one of the first designs to do it, it’s just a tiny little brr to squeeze out maybe 5-10Mph more. There’s no satisfying or sustained regaining of momentum, that gloriously raw, multi-launch moment of ‘here we go again.’ Just a quick little oops, could have designed that better, oh well, on we go. Inverse trims.
What follows after is a snakey bit through some foliage and around the back of the station building to the brakes. It’s ok, there’s nothing special going on here, no build to a climax. Just a perfunctory petering out to join the track back up at the end, which is a shame.
So, eh, not the most redeeming of arcs for a ride that had eluded me for so long, but glad to get the name off the hit list. It was fun enough. Wouldn’t and couldn’t queue again in those conditions. Would have lapped it given standard Chinese crowd levels, but I think the Venn diagram overlap for both that and the coaster being open is quite slim.
Coasters complete we checked out the other big indoor bit and saw some of this.
They have a 4D cinema but I wasn’t queuing for it.
While trawling through the Parks & Trip Reports page checking for dead space it struck me that there’s no love on here for good old Thorpe Park. Having lived less than an hour away from it since birth and having gone to the place far too much already, obviously I’ve never written a trip report about it.
R.I.P.
From having family focus and a farm to becoming the nation’s thrill capital, Thorpe has seen quite a change over the years. Sadly my first visit (the one where I didn’t ride anything anyway) took place in the midst of this transition so I never got to experience the park when it had dark rides and stuff. There’s also been an unhealthy dose of remove the good and install the bad more recently and I could spend a while moaning about that, but there’s enough of that around already.
Today I’ll just have to cast history aside and talk about rollercoasters again. There’s only 78 of them, I won’t keep you long.
2025 update – last year was a massive year for the UK coaster scene and Thorpe Park in particular, with the opening of Hyperia. It’s had me visiting multiple times again, something which hasn’t been happening for many, many years now, so I guess it’s pretty obvious where it stacks up…
#8 Flying Fish
Struggling for pictures here, but there’s only one place to start this list. Runaway Train at Chessington was one of the first major attractions I ever rode and this Fish is just the same thing in a field with none of the effort.
#7 X:\ No Way Out/X (not confusing at all)
Ooh, struggling to pick what comes next. I think it’s this although I always enjoyed the onride atmosphere whether it was in backwards mode or rave mode (awful, awful queue). As a coaster it never really gets going thanks to the multiple block sections and we would often use the time spent on these discussing how one could utilise these to improve the experience. Surprisingly I haven’t yet actually seen the real life attempt at this, in the form of The Walking Dead: The Ride. I have now, it’s awful. Circa 2018 I still held a Thorpe only annual pass because it was dirt cheap and I liked to pop in for a couple of hours when the opportunities arose. They held an introductory event for passholders but the retheme failed to open to the public on that day. So they invited us back several months later for an ‘even more special’ introductory event. And it failed to open again. The same year I noticed that I couldn’t even blitz the park on a mid week September visit (i.e. empty) without queueing what I would personally consider to be extortionate amounts of time (i.e. 20 minutes) and I haven’t been back untilHyperia.
#6 Colossus
This is a shame, because the ride is (was) a legend. No points for creativity on the layout itself, but the way they blended this huge, record breaking coaster into the landscape is totally admirable. I used to like the ride a lot. It provided me with my very first inversions (all 10 of them) and I remember a time when doing back to back laps of the thing to close out the day was an exciting prospect and something to be proud of. Now it’s just there, steadily getting less interesting as hundreds more of the same model get thrown up around the world without a second thought. I have no desire to ride it any more because a) it’s not that good and b) it’s not that special. Stop me please, I’m moaning about clones again, but this is one of the reasons why – status. Colossus was a big name in the UK, even just being a rollercoaster that your average person knows by name is an achievement in itself. It broke records, set standards, had an identity. Then China builds a couple more of the same – oh no, it’s not unique any more but it’s alright, I’m the only man who actually experiences this sacrilegious act. Oops, watch out, there’s one in Italy. And then this daft idea happens and I’ll say no more.
#5 Stealth
From one British icon to another, I won’t mention the fact that this one got cloned too. It bothers me less because you’d hardly call this a layout and it’s become a bit of a ride type in its own right – a way of making things go very high and nothing else. Aside from the lightning quick duration of the ride I have to admit that the sensation of launches on their own don’t particularly excite me any more. It’s my own loss, I’ve just ended up doing a fewtoomany and the impact just isn’t as prominent as it once was. Once that’s gone, there’s nothing much left of Stealth. A bit of an ‘nnnnnngh’ into shoulder restraints over brake fins and the sound of someone’s makeup bag exploding into the car around you. Unlike Colossus this ride still has presence though, and I appreciate that. The strong thematic experience of the whole Amity area with the seemingly endless Big Bob on WWTP radio loops, the existence of Tidal Wave and side plot of ’50s drag racing might just be the most quality thing about Thorpe Park.
#4 Saw: The Ride
Despite it being the first rollercoaster I really followed the construction of, I took basically no pictures of this once it opened. All I’ve got is this terrible one that wouldn’t even pass as ‘artsy’. There may be some twisted reason as to why I did follow this one, beyond the fact that I was old enough to have free reign of the internet and it was being built at my local park. I was also a fan of the Saw franchise. Mmm… torture porn. I was talking about status above and things just stick in your mind about some rides. 1) There was a BBC Radio 2 talk show about how inappropriate the branding of this ride was. The arguments amused me to no end and I just enjoyed the fact that it was getting attention. 2) Based on hearing this my Dad decided to start telling me to stop riding these rollercoasters because the forces aren’t good for your brain (1000 later he still does! Sorry). 3) It made my cousin cry. This type of stuff helps a ride to become a legend in it’s own right and the fact that it has both retained the brand and remained uniqu- “Excuse me.” “Wait, what?” There’s one in Australia? Oh it’s alright, I haven’t done that one yet and err… it has a different theme.” “Hypocrite.” -as an attraction means that Saw: The Ride still interests me. It’s far from the best of coasters but I do enjoy the dark ride elements and on the days when the train decides not to slow down in the second half of the layout it packs a particularly violent punch.
#3 Swarm
Aww, I like Swarm. Everyone says it’s boring and bleak and while standing in the queue I’ve literally seen guests playing a game of cards on it mid ride in mock fashion (I hope) of the apparent forcelessness. To illustrate that point better than I ever could, here’s a man in sunglasses. Mr. ‘Launches don’t excite me’ over here actually sees stars on the sustained turn around the water so doesn’t personally see the logic. The near miss elements are cool in the right seat and the inversion over the station is, well, it’s good to watch. Sometimes there’s fire! and the year they turned the back seats around (brave it backwards) was a stroke of genius. I laughed uncontrollably from start to finish on this version, had a ridiculous amount of fun and miss it deeply.
#2 Nemesis Inferno
Another UK park, another B&M invert near the top. It’s no wonder I used to consider it one of the most consistent ride types in the world (don’t worry, just like everything else I’ve since put myself off that idea too). Inferno feels like the most complete rollercoaster package in the park, partly thanks to the quirky little pre-lift dive through the volcano but mostly just from the fact that it’s the most quality piece of hardware at Thorpe. There’s a flow and grace to these that you’ll struggle to find anywhere else in the country and it seems to be getting more forceful as the years go by – ageing like a good cheese. Personally I’ve never been offended by the whole Nemesis branding comparison because I’m not overly attached to the original and in my eyes they’re definitely not worlds apart as an onboard experience. I view this one just for what it is and it’s a cracking coaster.
#1 Hyperia
Yes, the latest and greatest from Thorpe Park comfortably took the crown for me. Upon visiting in opening year, it quickly blew me away with the power of it’s initial innovative elements, although the second half of the already short ride left a little to be desired. Having gone back a couple times since in 2025, the ride has only improved, with rumours swirling around new wheel compounds or other methods to make the train run reliably run faster, or at least not get stuck in one of the valleys as it had been doing a little too regularly. In any case, I’ve experienced a noticeable extra kick to the final two hills that follow the (already no longer functioning) splash section and trim brake. While this still results in a ride that leaves you wanting more, because it’s just so damn short, every element now hits, and hits hard, and I love it for that.
Bonus Round
One of my favourite rides in the park isn’t actually a rollercoaster and I wanted to give a shout out to Detonator. Whenever I spent a cheeky hour in the park it was Swarm, this, Inferno, this, leave. Buzzing. Now it’s Hyperia, this, Inferno, leave. I’m not big on flat rides but I am a sucker for drop towers. With the majority of my hobbying life now dominated by a lack of butterflies in the stomach on even the most vicious of airtime, a top tier drop tower can still have that gorgeous effect on me and this is a prime example, right on my doorstep. This little Fabbri absolutely destroys most of the much more significant towers I’ve ridden throughout the world. They’re all heartless, soulless and comparatively forceless. Whether Thorpe are playing the ticking time bomb soundtracks, mindgames over the microphone or running it in absolute silence (none of these now, the new theme is bad) it still gets my nerves going. It cheats, supposedly, it kicks the car downwards rather than leaving things to pure freefall, and that makes all the difference. Why can’t they all do that?
We’ve reached the end at last. Final day started out a lot more optimistic in my head because although Great Adventure is downtwo coasters, it’s also up oneclone. And free.
Reality soon kicked in when we mathed out going though and it was at that point in the two week trip where you start to just care less – the New Jersey effect. It would surely make for another miserable day trying to combine it with
Day 14 – Luna Park
Bit of a legend this one, but not one I’ve ever been particularly excited for. When you’re flying in or out of JFK airport, this being the first time we had willingly done that, it seems silly not to pop in for the intense coaster injection.
The lack of excitement stems from it being a Zamperla catalogue showcase, you know that Italian company that also poorly modifies 400ft launch coasters. So aside from a beach and the name, there’s really not much glamour to it.
There’s the beach.
First up was #1 Tony’s Express, a name no doubt much more effective with a New York accent.
As a coaster it was pretty poor, though it looks the part, vibrating in an unpleasant fashion for the entirety of the two laps, far more so than it should for a family coaster anyway.
Integrated log flume is a nice touch, I guess.
Next to that is the #2 Thunderbolt, which was a faff of a queue for 10 people because the loose item storage window acts entirely optional but then the staff in the station wait until the last second to make it mandatory and then send everyone back to the window, through other people and a turnstyle after having scanned their tickets or wristbands.
They’re a faff of a ride too really, still not a fan of the restraints, to no surprise. Comes down in such an unprecedented place, mid-leg, which negates any decent force it may or may not have. Most notably this had less violent ejector than the Alabama equivalent, which could be seen as a blessing or a curse.
Next to that is #3 Steeplechase, one of these horrible things again. But horseys, not motybikes.
Then there’s a Mini Mouse model called #4 Mini Mouse. Didn’t have the imagination to call it Tuff Tuff Taget.
The #5 Tickler, which didn’t tickle.
The #6 Circus Coaster, which to me is famous for being the best coaster at that park in China with the worst coaster lineup in the world. Still waiting on someone to find me a worse one.
Oh and the #7 Cyclone I guess. Turns out if you go as hardcore as us, then this is the best parking spot as it’s reasonably priced for a 2 hour stint, which is plenty for 10 one and dones. Vibes are guaranteed, safety is not.
I was more worried for the ride however, it has built a reputation over the years for being a murderous old thing on and off.
It was fine however, always good to get on an icon and quite fun in our forcefully blagged non-wheel seat. Bit of bounce, bit of force, super cushy and comfy seating which is always one of the highlights of things like this.
Definitely the only real reason to come really, it even stands alone from the rest of the park. I like the fact that you enter from an actual street, through a protective cage.
And this view, I like this view.
Confusingly, in the middle of Luna Park lies
Deno’s Wonder Wheel Amusement Park.
Where drink will flow and blood will spill. They have a separate ticketing system for their attractions, which include highlights such as
The #8 Sea Serpent. No review required.
and the #9 Skyflyer. No review required.
Again we’d saved their best for last with #10 Phoenix, which during the trip I had managed to convince myself was another S&S and then, post Dutch Wonderland, was concerned about.
It’s a Vekoma though, thankfully, words we can safely utter this decade. Pretty decent too, but I’d put it below the Orkanen layout and above the Kvasten one. Bit less swoopy and forceful, more faffy with the space. 2 laps is nice for the pay per ride.
Luna Park
I lied, I hadn’t saved the best for last, I had saved the worst for last.
Ending the trip on a Volare seemed oddly cathartic, except that #11 Soarin’ Eagle turned out to be the best damn Volare I’ve ever ridden.
It was (relatively) smooth, I put myself in the perfect position and it performed an appropriate amount of braking throughout, to not get too out of hand. Zamperla’s new best of the trip.
I lied, we didn’t end the trip on a Volare. After making record time it turned out we had driven past a Wacky Worm up the road.
Adventurers Family Entertainment Center
didn’t even have photos on RCDB, which is amazing considering their location. Less so when they ignore your submissions.
This guy on #12 TL*3 Coaster does though, and he’s about as gone as I was at this stage.
Free parking and a +1, what’s not to love? Better than Cedar Point.
Yay, Summary time.
Total states – 15 New creds – 78 New dark rides – 9 New parks – 19 New RMCs – 0 Best new coaster – Behemoth(?) Best coaster – Wicked Cyclone(*) Best new dark ride – Whispering Pines Hotel Best new park – Story Land Best park – Knoebels Distance travelled – 3357 Miles Spites – 17/95 (17.89%)
Kinda rough overall, the numbers don’t always sell the story but no Alpenfury, no Top Thrill 2, no Goliath, no Siren’s Curse, no Quantum Accelerator, no Crazy 8 Family Coaster, pretty much all the reasons we chose and planned this particular trip, brings it into perspective a little more. Plus I would have liked to actually say goodbye to Batwing and Wild One, having made the effort.
Boulder Dash (eventually), the Maine and New Hampshire parks were nice to finally get to, Canada was not, and we ended up relying rather heavily on some old favourites in Kennywood, Knoebels and Kings D to save our souls.
Had a lot of fun anyway, despite the complaining, it’s either still my favourite thing to do right now or I’m too far gone to know any better.
Should have been telling stories about more European creds around about now but it’s still 2025. Guess it’s time to go back to my roots.
Six Flags America is gone. Or at least it will be at the end of 2025. It was for this reason that we deemed it worthy of a farewell visit. Plus it had a +1. Plus it was free.
After the trip we had been having I had rather been rooting for it to bring a bit of an underdog arc, a fitting closing to its career, a good day out. It wasn’t to be.
Day 13 – Six Flags America
Things started fine after a long drive, some merciful clouds in the sky, minimum crowds and the B&M that was closed for conversion last time we visited was in operation.
Thus we began on #1 Firebird. Front row. Floorless. It was ok.
Fair play to it really, generally these ex-stand-up things kinda suck, but the layout manages to still be mildly interesting and it rides pretty well for the sheer age of it. Once was enough though.
Joker’s Jinx e-stopped itself on the launch, which must have been a pleasant experience for all involved. Don’t care, clone.
Superman – Ride of Steel rode like ass, Darien Lake was infinitely better. Once was enough.
Roar rode like ass, GCI have come a long way, on and off. Once was enough.
Batwing was closed. Best ride here, RIP.
Wild One was closed. Best ride here, RIP.
Ragin Cajun wasn’t closed. Probably see you around.
Not great then, I used to like this place but the ride availability was pretty abysmal on this occasion and it was a little sad to see it out this way ourselves. I’ve seen and heard of other visits that were fine though and I hope they can hold it together for at least a decent final, final day. Better than Cedar Point, but shan’t be missed.
Kings Dominion
Down the road and hoping to steal the footfall is old mate Kings D. Happy 50th.
Feels like we’ve been here a lot, and we have, they’re always cooking up a cred or two in conjunction with our visits.
And this time was no exception, with #2 Rapterra mooching around. The new area felt very Merlin in implementation, there’s an illusion of effort in presentation sprinkled around, but something just feels off about it.
Wasn’t impressed with the ride at all. Shakes quite badly throughout, has no particularly interesting forces to speak of, then ends on the classically uncomfortable roll for extra vest bite into your collarbone on the brakes. Once was enough.
Which meant that the better new cred of the park was the #3 Great Pumpkin Coaster because they let adults on now.
Then it was time for Twisted Timbers to kick our ass repeatedly. I’ve gushed about this one enough before, along with the fact that it’s better than Steel Vengeance. The fact that it was walk on and we weren’t dying from heat stroke also brought the trip full circle and back into my good books with some mid-sized RMC-based destruction.
Rode Grizzly but didn’t take a picture. It’s vastly improved with the retracking work and was actually pretty fun, not least for the station banter about it actually being Shockwave in disguise. Better than Rapterra.
Rode Racer 75 but didn’t take a picture. Happy 50th. Great woodie. Old, smooth, straight, full of airtime and with a bonus bit of racing fun. Felt like they’d added the Yoy-style poorly tuned lift hills that try and catch up with each other but always overshoot, which added to the charm. Better than Rapterra.
305 was closed but I was kinda glad because it’s an ugly colour and has a stupid name now. It will never be the same without being told to start my engines.
Eiffel Tower was closed as it seemingly always has been and always will be.
But they have this and Cedar Point doesn’t. Better than Rapterra.
Overall a great time at a great park and I’ve clearly run out of things to say.
