France 07/18 – Dennlys Parc + Bagatelle

This particular crawl was meant to happen last year, but it turned into something better(?) in the same area.
Better late than never.

Day 2 – Dennlys Parc

Not sure what I was expecting, but this wasn’t it. A tiny little place with Spanish pop music everywhere, it had a fair bit of charm.

#1 Nitro

Got extra excited for a bit as I had forgotten what this is, but damn, it’s a Moebius loop (one continuous piece of track). Sends you round both sides in one cycle, so no quandaries about half a cred or anything.
It contained a couple of rough turns, but nothing too serious. The main drops and hills weren’t bad, but it ain’t no Pax.

#2 Furio

Can it get worse? The ‘worst custom steel rollercoaster in the world’ – Mitch Hawker 2013.

What? How? It rode with the same level of inoffensiveness as the Soquet yesterday. Does pretty much nothing.

#3 Voltigo

And we’ll finish off the coasters here with pretty much nothing. At least it’s an obscure manufacturer for the list. Only 2 Gosettos in the world.

Did one of those Desperado 4D screen shooting attractions where you sit on the little rocking horses as they’re quite fun. Must have done too many now, victory over everyone else came quite easily.

Did one of these discount rapids rides, which was a laugh.

That looks like the same tower as yesterday. Eh, might as well.
No tingle from this version though. Pure ejector at the top of each main burst – they’re running it hard. Highlight of the park for sure.

That was all rather easy. Next?

Bagatelle

Bit of a weird entrance to this park. Bag check before a pink tunnel under the road, then some big metal entrance gates and many confused people standing around.

#4 Kid’z Coaster

Excellent once you get inside though. The first thing you come to is a Wacky Worm on tarmac. A beautiful sight.

#5 Gaz Express

Was expecting some at least some moderate crowding on a summer weekend, but maybe football (World Cup final) is good for something. Walked straight on to the most intriguing attraction here.

The Soquet Aquatrax, potentially their finest achievement. 2 helices of doom, one moment of violent air time in the back and some tasty fire effects. Who could ask for more?

#6 Famous Jack

The name doesn’t sound like a cred, but here we are. Reverchon failed to beat Zamperla today.

#7 Triops

The last couple of areas had seemed quite nice, but now we’ve stumbled onto concrete wasteland with a Vekoma Invertigo on it. It’s like they know not to try and glam it up.

With their Paris Metro air gates.

Oh no, Invertigo. My very first of these. Got somewhat nervous about how terrible it could be. The sign even mentions ‘side impacts’ (or lateral chocolate), so that’s reassuring.

The restraints are super hench like El Condor, already touching your ears before you move, so that’s reassuring.

It’s fine. No problem at all. Not as intense as a regular Boomerang, and smoother than most of them. Might still be a spark of Liseberg (its original home) magic left in it.

Can’t find the last cred now.

#8 Spirale des Dunes

Oh there it is, a baby Soquet. That’ll do.

Again that was all rather easy, time for a baguette and to see what else they have.

Like Bocasse, they were also celebrating some sort of anniversary, by splashing out on a new(?) film for their simulator attraction. This was beyond confusing, starting with what felt like a circus horror walkthrough, expecting a preshow in a punch and judy box – nope. Expecting a preshow in a room with screens inside giant 3D glasses – nope. Straight on the ride, no glasses, the simulators are decorated with bones, pop music playing, “hold the red bar.”
The video was a rollercoaster on the moon!
Well that was a thing.

Disaster struck at this moment. Somehow my drink had leaked absolutely everywhere in my bag. An actual swimming pool of it, just stewing in the bottom.
Everything got affected, everything. It all smells rather fruity now, but also a tad sticky and I’ve had to order myself a new passport as several of the stamps are now unreadable. Volvic you heartless bastards.

The log flume here had a bit of pace to it. Drier than my bag though.

Is that a… a Hafema rapids? Had to assume it’s a Soquet again, but it does have the same crazy whirlpool element, just with less enjoyable wall collision. This became the trip of surprisingly good water rides. Drier than my bag though.

Who needs one log flume when you can have 2? Smaller than the first, but a more intense drop for its size. Drier than my bag though.

Had another go on Gaz Express and some kid in front of me decided to stick his hand/head in the fountains that spray the track mid ride. I got SOAKED by this, but still drier than my bag.

And that was it. The place was turning into a ghost town due to that sports thing and we had a Chunnel to catch. Assume everyone in the terminal was British as there was no reaction to the final result of the match.
Train was delayed as always. People were moaning as always. Burger King was broken as always. That’s enough of that for one year.

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